The Need of Two

Author: Orrymain
Category:  Slash, Major Angst, H/C, Drama, Romance, Missing Scene/Epilogue, Established Relationship
Pairing:  Jack/Daniel ... and it's all J/D
Rating:  NC-17 (for subject matter)
Season:  2
Spoilers:  Need, Hathor, Prisoners
Size:  197kb
Written:  October 7,16-26,28, November 11-12, 2004  Revised for consistency:  January 20, 2007
Summary:  Daniel suffers withdrawal from the sarcophagus, and it's up to Jack to get his lover through a very difficult recovery, but will Jack's own traumatic past catch up to him?  Just who will end up taking care of who?
Disclaimer:  Usual disclaimers -- not mine, wish they were, especially Daniel, and Jack, too, but they aren't.  A gal can dream though!
Notes:  
1) Warning: this fic includes potentially sensitive subject matter re: Jack's time in an Iraqi prison.  Readers know I will only get “so” graphic, but anyone terribly squeamish should be forewarned.
2) Hanky warning!
3) Sometimes, Jack and Daniel speak almost telepathically.  Their “silent” words to each other are indicated by asterisks instead of quotes, such as **Jack, we can't.**
4) Silent, unspoken thoughts by various characters are indicated with ~ in front and behind them, such as ~Where am I?~
5) This fic stands alone, but it does reference my other fic(s), “Backlash”
6) Thanks to my betas who always make my fics better:  Claudia, QuinGem, Linda, Kat, Drdjlover, Alison!

The Need of Two
by Orrymain

“Colonel, you can't do this,” Janet called out after the fleeing Air Force Colonel.

“Oh, yes, I can, and I am,” Jack said, turning and marching out of the general infirmary, heading for Daniel's private room.

“No, you ... Colonel, please stop,” the petite doctor requested.

Directly on her heels was Doctor MacKenzie, the psychology expert, who indignantly shouted, “You are not going to touch that man, Colonel, or I'll have you restrained.”

Jack was practically running through the corridor.  Hearing the two doctors, he stopped and turned.

“Look, he doesn't want to be here.  He's a civilian.  Daniel can go wherever he wants, and he wants to go h...” Jack paused, realizing what he had been about to say, that Daniel wanted to go home, only the home Jack meant was his house, not Daniel's apartment.  “Doc, it's his choice,” he said, looking at Janet and ignoring MacKenzie whom he didn't like or trust.

“He's suffering through withdrawal, Colonel.  You have no idea what he's going through, and it's only the beginning.  You're not equipped to do that at Daniel's apartment.”

“I'm taking him to my place, Janet.  I'll take care of him.”

“Colonel O'Neill, I don't have time for this.  As a physician on this base, I have certain rights, and since Doctor Jackson is one of my patients, I can say this.  Colonel, I order you to stay away from Doctor Jackson.  He is not to leave this base.”  MacKenzie looked at Janet.  “Doctor Fraiser, I have an appointment at the hospital I can't miss.  I'll let you handle things from this point, but I expect my orders to be respected.”

“Moron,” Jack mouthed quietly as the doctor departed.

“Colonel, Doctor MacKenzie aside, it's in Daniel's best interest to remain at the SGC.  He's at a critical point in his recovery.  I cannot condone his discharge at this time.”

“I'm taking him to my house, and I'll take care of him,” Jack reiterated calmly.

“And when did you become a physician?  Daniel needs medical care: qualified medical care.  You can't just whisk him out of here with medication you're not qualified to dispense and ...”

“He wants out.”

“No, Colonel.  I won't allow you to do this.”

“You don't have a say in the matter.”

“Colonel O'Neill, I do have a say in this, and not only can I not in good conscience release Daniel, but I won't.  While he may not be military, he is contractually bound to the military, and due to the nature of the Stargate Program, I *am* running this show.”

“You or MacKenzie?”

“Sarcasm isn't going to help right now.  Daniel is staying here.”

“He *wants* to go home ... you know that.  His apartment is too small, so we're going to my house.  End of story.”

“I don't think General Hammond will allow that, either,” Janet threatened subtly.

“Doctor Fraiser, I am taking Daniel out of here ... now, and there's nothing you can do to stop me.”

“But there's something I can do, Colonel.  What's going on?” Hammond asked, clearly not happy at the feud being played out in the corridors of the SGC.

“General, Daniel doesn't want to be here.  He doesn't feel ... comfortable.  He wants to overcome this thing without an audience, at home, and I intend to let him do that.”

“Jack, I know you and Doctor Jackson are close, but in this situation, I think Doctor Fraiser's opinion should prevail.”

“And my opinion is that Doctor Jackson should, and *needs*, to remain at the SGC for round-the-clock care.”

“No,” Jack stated stubbornly yet calmly as he moved towards Daniel's room.

Hammond glanced at Janet.  Although he was not surprised that Jack was upset by the situation, he was surprised at Jack's determination to go the extra mile for Daniel.  Silently, the two followed Jack into Daniel's room.  Daniel was restrained on the bed, for his protection and others.

“He's tied down like an animal.  Tell me, Doctor Fraiser, how is this helping him?” Jack demanded.

“J'ck?  JACK!”

“I'm right here, Daniel; so is the general.  Daniel, tell General Hammond what you want.”

Daniel was breathing heavily, sweat pouring down his body.  He tried to focus on Hammond, but saw only a blur.  He searched again for Jack.

“Home ... Jack.  I want to go home.”

“Daniel,” Janet said, approaching the side of the bed.  “The Colonel isn't qualified to ...”

“Please ... home ... now.  Jack?”

Hammond moved closer and said as gently as he could, “I'm sorry, Doctor Jackson, but I can't allow Colonel O'Neill to go against the advice of Doctor Fraiser.”

The tiny sob from Daniel at the general's words broke Jack's heart.

“General ...”

“Colonel, I order you to get some sleep.  Maybe in the morning you'll be able to see things a little more clearly.”

“Sir ...”

“Dismissed, Colonel.”

“I'm sorry, General.  I'm taking Daniel now.”

Jack untied Daniel's restraints, pulled his lover up, and removed the IV shunt.  When Janet moved to try and stop him, he fixed her in place with one of his infamous death stares.  She froze and looked at Hammond who seemed stunned into inaction by his 2IC's blatant disregard of a direct order.
 
The Colonel pulled Daniel up onto his feet, supporting the young man as much as possible, and walked out the door, completely ignoring Janet's demands that he stop.  Unfortunately for the lovers, Hammond regained his senses, picked up the phone, and seconds later, Jack found himself surrounded by a group of Marines.

“Home, J'ck.”

“Colonel,” Hammond said as he walked into Jack's sights.  “Don't make this harder than it has to be.

Helplessly, Jack looked at Daniel, then back at the Marines.  He had no choice, so reluctantly, he released Daniel to the care of the medical team and watched as they carted him away.

**I'll be back.**

**NO! Don't leave me here!**

In his most authoritative voice, Hammond spoke, “Colonel, I want you to follow my orders.  Go home, get some sleep, and tomorrow we'll look at options.”

“Yes, Sir,” Jack droned as he backed away and headed for his office.  

Jack O'Neill was an unhappy man who was very angry at the world.  Daniel was his lover, but he had no legal rights or claims.  He couldn't even make the arguments that might help convince Janet and Hammond to let him care for the younger man without risking a jail sentence.  He sighed, wondering if he was even thinking clearly.  He loved Daniel, and right now, following Daniel's wishes was the most important thing in the world, even though part of him knew Janet was right; there was a risk.

Feeling miserable and defeated, Jack sat down in his chair and stared into the darkness.  His mind wandered back to a few hours earlier when he had chased Daniel into a storeroom after the younger man had broken free of his restraints and run from his private room.

It had been touch and go, but Jack finally got through to his lover, and then he had made him a promise.  Daniel had begged Jack to take him home, and Jack assured him he would.

~It's not going to be easy.  We need medication.  No, cold turkey.  You're going to hate me, but then you'll love me again.  That's how it goes when your world is controlled by stimulants.  Reality becomes a blur, but I'll help you to focus again.  You're counting on me, Danny, and I won't let you down.~

Jack looked up towards the ceiling.

~Okay, if You are ... You, could You help me out here?  He doesn't deserve this misery.  I'm not sure I can do it, but I have to.  Give me a hand, will ya ... if You are ... You.~

====

It was 3 a.m., and a light but chilly breeze filtered through Colorado Springs.  It was a calm night, with no signs of rain or snow on the horizon, but at fifty-three degrees, it was still cold.  At a stoplight, Jack glanced up at the moon.  It wasn't full, but it was close.  It loomed over him, seemingly lighting his way as he drove the winding road leading to the Mountain and calmly went through the security gate to the parking area assigned to SGC personnel.

Fall was coming at a rapid pace, and Jack had looked forward to sharing this new season with his lover.  His lover ... his Daniel.  It was all so new, but it felt more right than anything Jack had ever done in his life.  His dream had come true amid the heat of the summer while wishing upon a falling star, and he'd make sure that in the fall of their first year as a couple, Daniel was safe and protected in his arms, no matter what the cost.

The base was as quiet as it would ever be in a place that functioned twenty-fours a day.  Jack sat quietly in his truck, waiting.  His mind raced back to the cause of their current predicament.

~It was my fault; I didn't make sure my team was clear, and you're the one paying the price, Danny; the man I love most in life.  My fault.~

//Flashback//
Inside the dark and damp mine, the weary members of SG-1 were close to the breaking point as they used their picks and tools to search for naquadah.  Daniel, in particular, was exhausted.

The exhausted archaeologist sat down on a rock stating, “I can't move anymore.”

A loud horn sounded, and the Jaffa in charge ordered the prisoners to put down their tools.  Other Jaffa began to unshackle the prisoner's leg irons, beginning with Sam and then Teal'c.  As Jack's were removed, he exchanged barbs with the Jaffa in charge.  They'd argued before, and Jack was anxious to get some revenge for the Jaffa's attitude.

As they stood, Jack saw their chance.  He hit the guard.  Teal'c, who had not put down his picking tool, used it to knock out the guard standing next to him, and then tossed it like a knife through the air, taking out yet another of their Jaffa guards.  Jack picked up a staff weapon and fired at the last of their captors that were nearby.

“Let’s go.  Let’s go,” the colonel ordered anxiously.

“This way,” Teal'c announced, leading the way out.

Jack and Sam followed.

~Where's Daniel?~  “Let’s go, Daniel!” Jack shouted.

Daniel had simply sat and watched the entire escape play out.  He had been caught off guard and was stunned by their success.  Normally, it wouldn't have affected him, but he was so exhausted that his muscles ached, and he was still in his leg irons.

~Why now?  I can't move.  My legs hurt.  Gawd, I'm still chained up.  Go Jack.  Get away.~  “I’m coming!”  ~I'll never make it, but you go.~

As Daniel struggled to move and escape with his teammates, a group of Jaffa entered the area and opened fire.  A direct hit to some unstable rocks high up on the wall brought the lot tumbling down, and all SG-1 could see was Daniel being swallowed up by a mound of rocks.

~NO!  Danny, what have I done?~  Jack's heart stopped when he turned and realized what had happened.  He ran back to the pile of stone and frantically began to take them away, one by one, until he finally saw his injured lover.  ~Danny, I love you; I'm sorry.  I'm so sorry.~

The young man was alive, but unconscious.  Jack ordered Sam and Teal'c to keep going, but it was too late.  The Jaffa were blocking their exodus.

“Help me, Teal'c,” Jack cried out as they worked to free Daniel.

“Daniel?” Jack asked, taking the young man into his arms.

“He needs help,” Sam pleaded with their captors, seeing her friend's current state.

“He will die,” one of the Jaffa said heartlessly.  “Attempt to escape again, and you will all die.”

Jack lay Daniel gently down and jumped up, attacking the Jaffa.  He shoved his enemy against the wall.

“You have to help him.”

The Jaffa stared indignantly at Jack, but then another entered and spoke in a different language.

As they knelt by Daniel, Teal'c translated for Sam.

“He is warning the other of the Princess' interest in DanielJackson.  She is fond of him and might not appreciate hearing of his death.  They have sent for her.”

“Sir, maybe the Princess can help Daniel,” Sam called out.

“I should let him die,” the Jaffa said, his back still against the wall.

Jack released him, needing and wanting only one thing -- for Daniel to live.

Moments later, Shyla appeared, looking uncomfortable in the setting.  She saw Daniel's limp body.

“Quickly, take him to the palace.”

“Oh, I don't think so.”

“We can help him.  I have something that will make him better.”

Jack didn't like the idea of Daniel being subjected to alien technology.  His mind searched for an 'or' to save his lover.

~Isn't there a doctor on this lunatic planet?~

“It is the only way,” the black-haired maiden insisted.

“Sir.  He's dying.  She's right.”

Jack turned and stared at his lover.

“Take him,” he said, and then he looked at Shyla and gave her an evil stare.  “If he dies, I won't rest until you die, too.”

A punch in the abdomen brought Jack to the ground.

“Do not speak to the Princess in that manner.”

Jack went to say something to her, but she had already left, following the Jaffa who were carrying Daniel out the other way.

“CAN'T TAKE THE HEAT, PRINCESS?  WELCOME TO THE SLUMS!”  ~I'll kill her, the little witch.~  The Jaffa kicked Jack in the abdomen, knocking the wind out of him for a few moments as he rolled on the dirt ground.  ~Live, Danny.  What did I do?  How could I have made such an error in judgement?~

Sam rushed to Jack once all the Jaffa were gone.

“Sir?”

Jack crawled to sit against the wall.

“Leave me alone, Carter.”

“You didn't have a choice, Colonel.  Daniel needed medical attention.”

“I SAID LEAVE ME ALONE!”

“Yes, Sir.”

Sam got up and rejoined Teal'c who gave her a nod.

“He is most worried about DanielJackson.”

“So am I, Teal'c.  So am I.”
//End of Flashback//

~I was in such a hurry; I let my emotions control me.  The taunts.  I shouldn't have let him get the best of me like that.  It's just ... being in another prison.  It was a reminder.  Idiot!  You're an idiot, O'Neill!~

“Jack ...” Lou said quietly as he tapped on the window.

Jack started at the intrusion.  He was breathing hard from his trip down nightmare lane, and it took him a moment to regroup, but finally, he rolled down his window and looked at his good friend and former teammate, Lou Ferretti.

“You don't have to do this, Lou.  There's a lot at stake here.”

“We're wasting time, Jack.”

Jack paused for just a few seconds and then exited the truck.  He looked around and spoke softly.

“You could be court-martialed for helping me.”

“Jack, are we doing this, or do you want to stay and chit-chat until breakfast?”

“Thanks, Lou,” Jack said.

Jack needed help, and he had turned to the only other person he felt he could really trust.  He'd known Ferretti for several years, and they had gone on the original mission to Abydos together.  Had it not been for Charles Kawalsky, Ferretti would probably have been considered Jack's best friend, and now, their friendship was closer than ever.

Although Lou didn't know about Jack's love affair with Daniel, he knew the two were close friends, and while the Major had had a rocky start with Daniel on that first Abydos mission, they'd become friends of a sort as well.  Daniel still considered Lou Jack's friend, but he liked the man a lot.  Jack knew the archaeologist would never believe just how much Lou had come to respect him.

When Jack had called Lou earlier and requested his help, Lou hadn't hesitated, even though it could result in a court-martial.  It wasn't just being caught that was risky; it was the entire setup.  Hammond would know what had happened; security tapes would reveal it, and there would be little doubt as to the identity of Daniel's main kidnapper but Jack figured once it was done, Hammond would reluctantly give in; at least, that's what he was hoping.

“Let's go.”
 
====

The two friends made their way to the infirmary.  As they'd anticipated, the corridors were practically deserted, but one thing that had surprised them was the lackadaisical demeanor of the serviceman manning the security check-in.  He wasn't paying a lot of attention to the comings and goings of the personnel.

Although they weren't yet hiding their presence in the SGC, Jack didn't approve of the yawns or nonchalant manner of the guard.

~I'll have to fix that ... later,~ Jack thought after clearing the check-in.

Still, it would prove helpful in a few minutes.

Once on the correct level, Jack motioned towards the private room where Daniel was.  After a quick check of the surrounding area, Jack had established that Doctor Warner was working on something in his office.  He covertly watched two of the nurses head out of the infirmary on break, and the only other nurse currently working in the area was checking on a patient in the general infirmary.

~Where in blazes is that idiot?~

Jack stewed.  Even though it made things easier for him now, there was supposed to be an airman guarding Daniel's door, only the airman was nowhere in sight.  He made a silent note to reprimand the missing private at another point in time.

Nodding to Lou, Jack entered the private room.

“What the ...” Jack looked around, checking out every part of the room.

Hearing the exclamation, Lou sneaked a peek inside, expecting to see both Jack and Daniel.

“Jack, where's the Doc?”

“That's what I'd like to know!” Jack growled.

“Jack, look,” Lou said, drawing his friend's attention to the fact that one of the wrist restraints at the side of the bed was frayed.

Jack moved to examine it more closely, as well as the one opposite it.

“He must have been trying to get out of this all day.”

Jack also noticed the power to the monitors had been turned off.

~Smart boy.  Turn them off so they don't set off any alarms.~

Despite his worry, Jack couldn't help but admire Daniel's determination and ingenuity.

“Where do you think he went?” Lou asked.

Jack shook his head.

“We didn't pass him on the way in, so he had to go another route.”  ~I'm going to kill that airman ... oh geez, I hope Daniel didn't hurt someone else.  He'll never forgive himself if he has.  It's going to be hard enough to get him past knocking down Fraiser.~  **Daniel?  Are you out there?  Talk to me!**  ~Crap, nothing.~  “Come on, Lou.”

Lou followed Jack into the corridor, closing the door to Daniel's room behind them.  The two walked the area, looking for signs of Daniel.  Hearing footsteps, Jack and Lou ducked into a storage room.  They didn't want to be seen or get sidetracked.

Jack looked out the crack of the door and watched as the airman took his place in front of Daniel's room.

Lou chuckled.

“Jack, we're gonna have to do something about these bozos they're sending us.  That guy doesn't even know he's guarding an empty room.”

“He will ... later.”

Jack's tone was icy cold, and Lou almost felt sorry for the airman -- almost.

~Of course, knowing that he's guarding the Doc, he should have been more alert.  You'd think the Marines would have learned by now: anything happens to Jack's archaeologist, and facing Apophis unarmed would seem like a picnic compared to facing Jack.~

They resumed their search, finding all of the access shafts properly sealed.

“Jack, the door to the stairwell; it's ajar.”

The stairs weren't often used at the SGC, but like any facility, backups to elevators were needed.

“He went topside,” Jack thought out loud.  ~Of course, Danny loves it up there.~

Jack nodded towards the stairs, and Lou followed him as they began the long trek to the top of the Mountain.

“This is my exercise for the month, Jack,” Lou wisecracked.

“Just look for signs of Daniel; any signs.”  A few flights up, Jack sighed. “I don't believe this.”

Lying on one of the steps was an IV bag, half full, together with the needle that went into the patient.

“I guess the Doc got tired of lugging it around.”

“He's not thinking clearly, Lou.  We have to find him,” Jack said, his voice pained. He had seen a few droplets of blood on the stairs, too, which he assumed was from Daniel roughly pulling out the needle.  Jack ran his fingers through his hair in frustration.  ~I never should have left his bedside, no matter what Hammond said.  You could hurt yourself, Danny.~

“It's cold out there, Jack,” Lou said, a worried look in his eyes.

Jack nodded, and they continued their climb up.  As they neared the top, they took a chance and peeked out into a hallway and finding it empty, made their way to the nearest access shaft hatch.  They lucked out, finding one that was partly open, something Daniel would not have done if he were thinking rationally.

“Geez, Jack, if he's just wearing that hospital garb, he's gonna be a popsicle real quick.”

“Okay.  Listen, I think I know where he went.  Daniel ... he likes to go for walks.  I'll find him.  Go down to the parking level and guard the stairwell.  When I find Daniel, I'll bring him there.”

“Are you sure you don't want me to help you search?”

Jack debated for a moment, then made his decision.

“Guard the stairwell.  If I don't have Daniel down there in forty minutes, come back up and help me look, but if he's where I think he is, it'll take me less than half that time to find him and bring him back.”

“Anything you say, Jack.”

Lou headed back down while Jack began his search.  After fifteen minutes, his worry increased.  Daniel wasn't in the area he had expected him to be in.

**Danny?**

After twenty-five minutes, Jack had begun to second-guess his decision to search on his own, but then he heard tiny sounds -- sniffles and sobs -- that reminded him of a young child.

“Daniel?” he called out in a whispered but raised voice.

“Jack?  Find me!”

“I'm coming, Danny,” Jack responded, following the sniffling voice.

“Jack?”

“Aw, Danny,” Jack said, seeing his lover hunched down by a tree, tears streaming down his face.

“Jack?  Is it really you?” Daniel asked, raising his head up to look.

He had had his head buried in his knees, his arms wrapped around them.  Jack couldn't help but remember a time when his son Charlie had gotten lost in the woods.  The five-year-old had done the same thing -- found a tree to huddle next to, and then had sat down, crying until Jack had found him.  Jack took a breath, realizing that was a long time ago, and Daniel was definitely not five-years-old, and yet, at the moment, he was just as scared as Charlie had been that day.

“Yes,” Jack said, kneeling down and taking his lover into his arms.  “Daniel, you're freezing,” Jack chided, taking his coat off and putting it around Daniel's shoulders as he surreptitiously eyed the dried blood on Daniel's hand where the IV shunt had been pulled out.  “What on Earth were you thinking?”

“Home.  I wanted to go home.  You promised.  I tried to find you, but I got lost.  Where am I?”

“Danny,” Jack pulled the young man into his arms again.  “It's okay now.  You should have waited for me.  I told you I'd take you home, and that's what I'm doing.”

“Now?”

“Right now.”

Daniel was shaking, more from the night air than withdrawal at this point, and he was frightened.

“Tried to find you, Jack.  Kept calling for you.  You didn't answer me.  Why didn't you answer?  Don't you want me anymore?”

“Of course, I want you.  Want you so much.  I'm here now, Love.”

“It's so dark and cold,” Daniel cried.

“I know,” Jack responded, rubbing rapidly against Daniel's back to try and aid the warming-up process.  “You ready to go home?”

“Home ... with you?”

“Where else?”

Daniel sniffled, and Jack just couldn't resist, even though he knew the clock was ticking and Lou just might show up at any moment.

He kissed his lover, and was surprised when Daniel found the strength to return the kiss with such fervor that Jack fell backwards with Daniel lying atop him.

“Hey, Beautiful,” Jack said, smiling.  “As much as I love this, let's do it at home.”

“Okay,” Daniel sniffled again, getting off Jack.

Jack carefully guided a shaking Daniel down the ladder of the access shaft to the level where he had left the stairwell.

As they walked down the stairs to the proper level, Jack reminded his lover, “You have to be quiet, very quiet.”

“J'ck, I'm not ... feeling so great.”

Jack's heart ached at the pain he knew Daniel was in.

“I know, and it's going to get worse.”

“Don't ... I don't want ... people to ... to ... see me.”

“They won't; we're going home.”

Jack had his arm around Daniel's waist as they moved down the stairs.  Finally, they reached the parking level.  Cautiously, Jack opened the door and spotted Lou who had been keeping a covert eye on the area as requested.

Lou nodded, and with a smile, handed Jack a bag.

“Clothes?”

“Can't have the Doc walking out in that, can we?”

“Thanks.  Keep watch.”

Jack closed the door to the stairwell, leaving Lou on the other side.  

“What are you doing, Jack?”

“Getting you dressed.”

“Oh.”

As quickly as he could, Jack removed the hospital attire, putting it in the bag, then assisted a confused and shaking Daniel into his street clothes.  Finally, he led Daniel out of the stairwell, and they moved quickly to the security gate.

Daniel suddenly realized he and Jack weren't alone.

“Hi, Lou.  Did you come to visit me?”

“Hey, Doc.  I came to bust you out.”

Daniel smiled sappily.

“Wow.  Thanks, Lou.  You're a good friend.”

“You gotta watch that IV fluid, Doc.  It's going to your head,” the Major teased.

Jack got down to business.

“Lou, you know what to do.”

Near the check-in, Lou went first, initiating a discussion with the airman on duty about football.  The airman was lured into the discussion, and Lou positioned himself so that the airman was looking away from the security scanner.

Quickly, Jack led Daniel through it, placing their palms in position and sliding their cards through the exit gate.  The airman only glanced at the sight of the two men walking out of the facility, not even really sure who they were.  All he knew was that they had cleared the security, so obviously, they weren't of any concern.

Moments later, Lou excused himself, scanned himself out and headed for the parking lot, jogging to catch up.

“Lou, help me out here.”

Daniel was weak, his body still not up to any kind of real exertion.  He was sweating, and Jack was supporting him more and more.

Lou rushed to Daniel's side and assisted Jack in getting the archaeologist into the vehicle.

“Jack, you're going to have to do something about that airman.  That was way too easy.”

“Him and that moron who was supposed to be guarding Daniel's room.”

“You just can't get good help anymore,” Lou lamented, only half-joking.

“Yeah, you can,” Jack said looking gratefully at his friend.  “Thanks for the help, Lou.  I wasn't sure this was going to go so smoothly.”

“Uh, Jack, you better go.”

“Why?”

“Because Fraiser just drove in.”

Jack cursed, started the car, and raced to the final gate.  Free of it, he headed for home, but he was far from breathing a sigh of relief.  He looked over at his sweaty and pale lover.  He felt lucky on a couple of accounts, one of which was finding Daniel lucid enough to cooperate in their 'escape', but mostly, Jack had been lucky that they'd found Daniel before the entire base went on alert looking for the missing man.  He would have had no hope of spiriting the young man away with half the SGC looking for him.  Now, things would get worse, a lot worse, before they got better.

Once they got home, he took Daniel upstairs and settled him into their bed.  Then he went downstairs and locked up the house.  He looked around and sighed.

~For the next several days, this isn't a home; it's going to be a war zone.~

Jack took what he knew would be one of the few quiet moments over the next several days to sit down and relax, just for a minute.  He needed to just sit and make sure he was focused on the ultimate goal -- to get Daniel through the nightmare.

He thought about how unusually easy it had been to take Daniel from the SGC; their personnel were trained better than that.  The tired Colonel smiled and looked up towards the ceiling.

~Okay, if You are You, thank You.  I have a gut feeling You might have helped out a little with the security, or lack of security at the base, so ... if You are You, I'm in your debt.~

Jack closed his eyes and imagined making love with Daniel.  Soon; it would happen soon, when Daniel was well.

~Okay, Danny.  I'm ready now.  I'm ... ready.~

====

“Doctor Fraiser, what are you doing here so early?” Nurse Carol Cortazi asked when Janet entered the general infirmary.

“I wasn't expecting to be, Carol, but Doctor Warner called about Airman Lynch.

“He's not doing well, is he?”

“He could be better.  We may have to operate.  Where's Doctor Warner?”

“He was in his office a half hour ago.”

“Thanks.  Carol, how's Doctor Jackson?”

“He was sleeping the last time I checked on him; he seemed a little restless, but that's about it.”

“Okay.  I'll be with Doctor Warner.”

====

Fifteen minutes later, Janet and Warner were finishing their consultation.

“I'm afraid you're right, Skeet,” Janet said, addressing Warner by his nickname.  “I think we need to schedule surgery right away.”

“Anderson would be the best bet.  He's had more experience with this kind of thing.  I'll give him a call.”

“Okay, I'm going to check on Doctor Jackson, and then I'll meet up with you in Airman Lynch's room at 0500 hours.”

0500 was only twenty minutes away, but that's all the time the diminutive doctor needed to check on Daniel and get the medical team lined up to do a few more tests on Lynch.

“Airman,” she called to the man guarding Daniel's door.  He nodded, opening the door to let Janet inside.  Janet entered, stopping dead in her tracks.  “Airman, where is Doctor Jackson?”

“Ma'am?” the shocked airman responded, walking inside the room, only to come to an abrupt halt beside the angry looking doctor.

“Where is he?”

“I, um, he was ... I ... I don't know, Ma'am.”

“I want him found NOW, Airman!”

“Yes, Ma'am.”

Janet sighed, and looked around in frustration.  Seeing the frayed wrist restraint, she looked up indignantly towards the ceiling.

“Daniel, so help me, what am I going to do with you?”  ~At least no one got hurt this time.  Don't you understand, Daniel, that you need to be here?  You threw me over a bed and beat up a guard.  That's not even close to who you are.  We need to get you back here pronto!~

====

“I'm sorry, Ma'am,” the airman reported to Janet.  “It seems Doctor Jackson left the base some time ago.”

“Left the base?  HOW?”

“He ... walked out, Ma'am.”

Janet threw down a file she'd been holding, and walked into the airman's personal space.

“I'm *not* happy, Airman.  Do you know what they say about me when I'm *not* happy?”  She saw the airman gulp and flinch slightly.  “I have a needle with your name on it, and Airman, it's very, very big.”

Janet walked hurriedly out of the infirmary.

“Janet, you look angry,” Warner said as he crossed paths with Janet in the hallway.

“You don't know the half of it, but first things first.  Did you get in touch with Anderson?”

“He's on his way, and Lynch is being prepped.”

“Good.  Skeet, did you check on Doctor Jackson tonight?”

“I did a check about three hours ago.  He was awake, begging to go home.  He kept asking for Colonel O'Neill.”

“General Hammond ordered the colonel to ...”  Janet paused, suddenly realizing how Daniel managed to leave the SGC.  “I'll kill him.  I am going to kill him.”

“Janet?”

“Excuse me, Skeet.  Page me when Doctor Anderson arrives.”

Like a woman scorned, Janet headed for her office and picked up the phone.

“Hammond,” the general muttered groggily.

In a sarcastic tone, the physician said, “General, Colonel O'Neill has busted Doctor Jackson out of prison.”

“Excuse me?”

“I'm sorry, Sir, but I'm ... This is Doctor Fraiser, and I'm at the SGC.  It seems Doctor Jackson has left the base, and I'll give you three guesses as to who was responsible for that.”

“One will do, but prison, Doctor Fraiser?”

“Well, Sir, to Colonel O'Neill, that's what the SGC is to Daniel at the moment, and judging from how Doctor Jackson left, it's pretty much the truth.”

“I'm on my way.”

The major general hung up the phone and leaned back against his pillow.

“Jack, I may just court-martial you myself; or maybe a few months as liaison to Senator Kinsey might teach you something.”

====

“Doctor Fraiser, give me an overview of Doctor Jackson's medical condition: how he got where he is, what he's going through, and your prognosis.”

“Well, General, as you know, according to Daniel and SG-1, while on P3R-636, they were captured by the locals and accused of being Goa'uld spies, or something of that sort.  They were forced to work in the naquadah mines.  Essentially, they were slaves, kept in leg irons most of the day as they worked.  They were given very little food and water and had minimal rest time.  As a result, the entire team was malnourished and weakened.  They also had bruises and rashes on their lower legs and ankles.

“Apparently, Colonel O'Neill attempted an escape, but Daniel was still in his leg irons and couldn't keep up with the others.  There was a rockslide of sorts inside the mine, and Daniel was buried under rocks.  From what the colonel and Captain Carter described to me, he had a severe head injury, multiple cuts and lacerations, and probable internal injuries.  Captain Carter told me she thought Daniel would be dead within an hour if they hadn't done what they did.”

“And that was to allow Doctor Jackson to be treated by Pyrus and his people?” Hammond asked, wanting to confirm his understanding of what had been discussed during the debriefing.

“Yes, Sir.  They didn't know what kind of doctors were available, but they did know that Daniel's injuries were bad enough that without any help, he would have died for sure.”

“Go on, Doctor.”

“Well, after that, it gets a bit harder to know the exact details.  Since his return from the planet, Daniel has been so wired that, as you know, he wasn't able to sit down long enough to do a formal report, and even if he had been, frankly, Sir, I'm not sure he was capable of completing an accurate report.  Uh, so what we did was record Daniel's version of everything that happened and then had it transcribed, but again, you have to be aware that the report is jaded by the effects of the sarcophagus.”

“Understood.”

“Okay, well, according to the reports, the Princess, uh,” Janet shuffled through some papers and paused to read for a second, “yes, her name is Shyla.  Sir, she put Daniel in a sarcophagus.  It seemed to have worked, but the problem is that even after his injuries had healed, she continued to convince him to use the sarcophagus.  The result of that is what we're dealing with now.”

“Doctor Fraiser, this isn't the first time Doctor Jackson has used a sarcophagus.  He used it Abydos and again when he returned from Apophis' ship.  Both times he recovered from his injuries without incident.  How is this different?”

“Yes, both of those were single uses.  He was in the sarcophagus just long enough to heal his wounds, but this time, he continued to use the sarcophagus after his injuries were healed.”  Janet took a breath as she sought the right comparison and words for her thoughts.  “General, the sarcophagus is like a drug when used repeatedly.  When SG-1 returned from the planet, Daniel's system was completely out of whack. His vital signs were extremely elevated, and his endorphin level was through the roof.

“I was concerned, and at that point, privately spoke with Colonel O'Neill, recommending that he keep someone with Daniel until I could evaluate the test results further and consult with Doctor MacKenzie.  I was very much afraid that Daniel would eventually suffer some type of withdrawal.  I just underestimated the power of the withdrawal when it did finally occur.”

“So what happened next?”

“Daniel became anxious, jittery, and even agitated at almost nothing. He couldn't sit still, Sir.  There have been bouts of memory loss as well.  The, uh, worst moment up until then was the incident with Captain Carter.  She reported uncharacteristic behavior -- aggressiveness that bordered on violence to the point that she had become frightened by his actions.”

“Yes, she told me.  It's hard to believe Doctor Jackson would act in such a manner.”

“I agree, General, and I don't for a moment think he had any intention of hurting her, but his movements and their results were dangerous.  Then, as you know, Daniel collapsed here in your office.  We ran more tests and discovered that his liver and kidney functions were compromised, as well as his endorphin and electrolyte levels which were still through the roof.  Eventually, I realized that his cellular functions were breaking down.

“I still believe we made the right call.  Daniel was getting better; his vital signs were approaching normal readings: his blood pressure was down, his pulse normal, his body temperature down, and perhaps the most important thing, his cellular functions were taking root again.  We had a long way to go, but he was responding.”

“That's when he attacked you.”

“I don't look at it that way.  Daniel's going through a massive withdrawal, General.  Every indication is that his system was completely thrown out of whack as a direct result of the sarcophagus. It's like he's on heroin, crack, ecstasy, and who knows what, all at the same time, and now, he's coming down, and coming down hard.”

“Your prognosis?”

“Doctor Jackson is young and otherwise healthy.  He was responding to treatment, and I think with proper medical supervision that he'll make a full recovery, in a few weeks, but, General, there are risks in coming down from such a strong high as Daniel has been on, without being monitored and medicated, that are extremely severe.  Frankly, those are risks I do not want to take.  Doctor MacKenzie is especially concerned that Daniel might try to harm himself, or the colonel.  Sir, you *have* to get Colonel O'Neill to bring Doctor Jackson back here immediately.”

Hammond nodded and stood up, escorting the SGC's Chief Medical Officer to the door.

“Thank you, Doctor.  I'll get back to you,” Hammond said, closing the door behind the redheaded doctor as she exited.  He sighed as he returned to his desk and sat down.  He had a decision to make, and it wasn't going to be easy.  A knock on the door drew the major general's attention.  “Come.”

“Sir, this is what we have so far on Doctor Jackson's ... departure from the SGC,” Sergeant Davis spoke.  “There are some gaps, General; and here are the copies of the mission reports filed by Colonel O'Neill, Captain Carter, and Teal'c that you requested.”

“What about Doctor Jackson's report?”

“The transcription of his verbal report is at the bottom.”

“Thank you,” Hammond said, taking the reports and putting them in front of him on the desk.

Hammond began by reviewing Teal'c's report.  As always, his was the most succinct and would give Hammond a quick summary of the tactical events that had transpired.

“We arrived on P3R-636 and proceeded to look for naquadah or other minerals that would be of use to the Tau'ri.  We observed several Jaffa sending raw naquadah through the Stargate.  A young woman veered away from the group, and DanielJackson followed her.  I believe he thought the woman intended to harm herself.  He risked his life to save the woman from jumping off a cliff by grabbing her and pulling her back to safety.”

Hammond read on, learning that the young woman was a princess named Shyla and that her father, Pyrus, was king of the planet.  Interestingly, the planet was guarded by Jaffa, and these Jaffa had taken SG-1 prisoners in the belief that they had intended to harm their princess.

Teal'c's report continued, “We were taken to the palace.  DanielJackson seemed surprised when the woman did not admit the truth about her rescue.  We were taken to the mines and forced to dig for naquadah.  I was unable to find a way to escape.  The Jaffa were many, and we were kept in leg irons except for short periods during which we were fed something they called food.  As O'Neill sometimes says, I have had much worse.”

Hammond skipped ahead a few paragraphs.

“O'Neill initiated an escape attempt, but DanielJackson could not keep up.  He was injured and taken to the palace.”

Hammond decided he wanted to take a closer look at what had happened.  He opened Sam's report next and read her comments, hoping they weren't terribly scientific.

~Sorry, Captain, but Jack is right.  You do prattle.  I'm not saying that's bad, just that as Jack says, you're way, way smarter than we are, at least in the field of science.~

“Since Shyla hadn't admitted the truth to her father, Pyrus, he had us taken to the mines where the inhabitants of the world are forced to work as slaves.  The planet is full of raw naquadah.  There are so many uses for this.  We could ...”

Hammond skipped ahead.

~Prattling, Captain.~

“I reported my feelings to the colonel.  Lately, I've noticed that I can sense the presence of the Goa'uld.  I'm convinced it's because I was host to Jolinar.  Pyrus was not a Goa'uld, and strangely, I had a feeling that the Jaffa were actually Jaffa, either.

“We were forced to work long hours with few breaks.  We were dirty, sweaty, and hungry, and we were desperate to find a way out.  After the horn sounded signaling a rest period, the Jaffa began to remove our leg irons.  The Colonel seized a chance for us to overtake the guards and get away.  However, we acted before Daniel's chains had been removed.  He was already weak from the labor, and was slow to follow us out of the shaft.  I'm not sure what happened next, but I believe other Jaffa entered and opened fire, and that one of the staff blasts hit the side of the wall, dislodging a pile of rocks that fell on Daniel.

“His injuries were severe.  His pulse was weak, and once we dug him out, we could see several cuts and lacerations.  He wasn't responding to any first-aid treatments.  I told the colonel that I was concerned Daniel had internal injuries and advised him to let the Princess take Daniel to the surface to get medical attention.”

~Okay, I know about all of this.  Let's skip over this, too; and this.  Fascinating to know about the appearance of the ore, but not what I need to focus on right now.  Prattling, Captain, prattling.  Ah, here we go.  Sounds like SG-1 had been on P3R-636 for four days at this point.~

“All of a sudden, we saw Daniel.  He was dressed in royal robes that he said Shyla had given him.  He seemed fine physically, but there was something odd that I couldn't put my finger on.  I think the colonel wasn't very happy with him.  After all, Daniel was clean and relaxed, and we were filthy and exhausted, not to mention starving.  It didn't help when Daniel said he had only come to show us that he was okay, and that he'd talk to Pyrus that night 'at dinner' about freeing us.  I have to be honest and say that right at that moment, I wasn't real happy with Daniel, either.

“We didn't see Daniel again for several days, and when we did, I think we were all shocked.  He wasn't wearing his glasses, and his expression seemed a bit on the wild side.  His speech was erratic and excitable.  He just seemed a little incoherent.  What disturbed me most was Daniel's admission that he had been using the sarcophagus, at least nine or ten times, but I wondered if it had been more.  I really didn't feel as though I could trust what he was saying.

“The Colonel got a little angry.”

~I'll bet he did.~

 “He actually threatened Daniel that if he didn't get us out soon, that we'd find a way out ourselves and leave him behind.  Of course, that was just talk.  The Colonel would never leave a member of his team behind.”

Her next paragraph mentioned the radio message Daniel had told them he had sent through the MALP to keep Hammond from sending more personnel to the planet.

~Yes, that was strange.  No direct contact; just a recorded message with no opportunity to ask questions.  I should have acted on my gut feeling that something was wrong then.  Still, we need better procedures and protocol for circumstances such as those.~

Hammond made a note to study the issue and review their current policies.  Perhaps a change needed to be made.

The General returned to Sam's report, moving ahead once again.

“Suddenly, I was startled when I had this vision.  It was just a flash, or pattern of flashes.  I'm sure this all ties in with Jolinar.  Being a host to the Tok'ra, even for a short time, has left me with strange feelings and memories.  I never know when they will happen, just like this one.

“The feeling I got was one of severe danger.  The sarcophagus was dangerous to a person's soul.  It might heal injuries, but continued use like Daniel had been doing (using it while healthy) was altering his mind, perhaps even changing his brain chemistry.  I had a very strong voice inside yelling that we had to get Daniel out of there and away from the sarcophagus now, or we might never get him back, not the Daniel we know anyway.”

Another knock on the door took Hammond from his review.  Sergeant Davis entered.

“Thought you might want some coffee, Sir.”

“Thank you, Sergeant, and, Sergeant, I want two full security teams ready to accompany me off-base within thirty minutes,” Hammond ordered.  “Have them waiting for me at the security gate.”

“Yes, Sir.”

Hammond drank a few sips of coffee and flipped open Jack's report, which always made for colorful reading.  One thing Jack O'Neill never did, was hold back, not even in official reports.

“So Daniel does the damsel-in-distress thing again.  He never changes. Naturally, he saves the damsel, but she's more of a witch than the Princess she purports to be.  She clams up tighter than a lamb when Daddy Dearest wants to know what happened, which means we're all taken down to the Seven Dwarves territory, only the dwarves are smarter than we are and are nowhere in sight.”

~You do have a way with words, Colonel.~

“The next thing I know this arrogant Jaffa fellow is shoving us around and having a high-old time doing it.  I'd had enough.  I saw that Teal'c still had his picking tool, and the other Jaffa weren't paying attention.  My leg irons had been removed, so I hit the guy and ordered the escape.  In a flash, Teal'c had used the tool to knock out the Jaffa closest to him, then sent it flying through the air to take out another one.  The big guy has great aim!

“I picked up the arrogant Jaffa's staff weapon and took out another guard and ordered the team to move quickly away.  Teal'c and Carter were in front of me.  I turned and yelled at Daniel to get a move on.  He said he was coming, only I made a mistake.  I take full responsibility for having made a poor command decision.  I failed my team, but none of it would have happened had that 'Princess' not wanted Daniel as some prize for her mantel.

“Daniel's leg irons hadn't been removed, and he was weaker than the rest of us, mainly because he had been working harder than the rest of us.  Daniel doesn't know how to do anything half way.  He had said he couldn't move, but I hadn't taken it seriously.  When the fighting began, he couldn't keep up, and then I heard the sound of rocks falling.

“When I turned back around, I realized Daniel had been buried alive under the rocks which I assume had been loosened by a Jaffa staff blast.  We dug him out, but his injuries were severe.  Carter kept insisting that he needed help we couldn't give him.  She was right, but I didn't like it, not one bit.

“The guards had sent for Shyla, and I let her take him.  It was the only way to save his life, but it was a decision that continued to nag at me for days since we hadn't had any word from him, until the man who would be king finally showed up looking like a king while we were his paupers.

“A while later, Carter had one of those vision things; she said Daniel could dark side on us if we didn't get him away from the sarc.  I demanded to see Daniel, and that didn't go over too well, but I guess he got the message, because a few hours later, I was literally dragged in to see him.  It seems my warning came a little late.  Daniel was acting even stranger than before, and he seemed to have some type of memory loss, but he said we were free to go.”

Hammond next turned to the transcript of Daniel's oral report.  It was of great concern to him that his normally detailed and responsible head of archaeology couldn't calm himself long enough to do even a brief version of his required report.

According to the transcript, Daniel had been asked what had happened on the planet.  His response was a gigantic, rambling paragraph that seemed like an essay full of run-on sentences.  As he read it, Hammond realized they were in serious trouble.  Daniel Jackson was obviously affected by the sarcophagus, and had been for several days.

Daniel's response to the question read in part:

“She was beautiful, walking through the forest, the sunlight bouncing off her hair.  I couldn't let her die, but I don't understand why she lied to her father when we were brought to the palace, although maybe it was because she was just scared.  I'm her destiny.  She loves me, and I have to go back.  I am going back.  Oh, okay, well, so we were sent to the mines; man, it was hot down there, and I was tired, way tired, and I told Jack, but like usual, he wasn't listening to me; naturally he wasn't listening; he never listens.  He's always ... what?  Okay, so that's neither here nor there, so we were in the mines and suddenly Jack decides it's time to break out.  I mean, couldn't he have waited until they had my leg irons off and at least give me a chance, but oh, no, Mister Military just wants to hit the big, bad Jaffa and ... okay, okay, so I try to follow, but the next thing I know, I'm waking up in a sarcophagus wearing this dress.  So, it wasn't a dress, but robes.  If you ask me, they need to hire Armani.

“Anyway, Shyla loves me, and that's all that's important.  We went for a walk in the forest and talked about trees.  It's beautiful there.  Shyla's beautiful.  She loves me.  We're ... oh, okay, okay, okay.  Geez.  So, I try to get her to release the guys, but, uh, well, she loves ... I *am* answering the question, for crying out loud.  Where was I?  Oh, yeah, so she loves me and wants me to stay.  I told her I would and asked her to release them, but she didn't trust me yet.  I needed to get her to trust me, so I did what she wanted and got back into the sarcophagus.  Couldn't hurt, right?  Maybe it would make me see better.  Actually, uh, it, uh, did.

“So anyway, after a while, I went to see the guys.  They didn't really look that happy to see me; not a big surprise, but I was trying to get them out.  They just didn't understand that it was going to take time.  I had to court Shyla.  We had a great time; it's really a beautiful planet.  There's this waterfall ... right, you're no fun.  Okay, so over dinner that night, I found out that Pyrus was over seven-hundred years old.  Can you imagine?  Wow!  He had liberated his people from Goa'uld rule, and I guess he got control of the sarcophagus.  It kept him alive.  I had visions of Shyla being five-hundred or something, not that it would matter, because wow, she's beautiful, has that long black hair, and ... ALL RIGHT, fine ... so anyway, that's how Pyrus had become king and what he did was to pretend the Goa'uld were still there.  Pretty cool, huh?  I mean, think about it for a minute.  He continued to mine the raw naquadah and send it through the Stargate just like the Goa'uld had done, and he didn't stop there, the old smarty pants.  He created a bunch of Jaffa; I mean, literally took part of the inhabitants and said, 'You're Jaffa', just in case the Goa'uld ever came back.  It was like a Masquerade party.  Jack would like that.  Jack likes parties, well, kiddie parties anyway.  There's something about Jack I'm supposed to remember, but, oh well, guess it's not really that important, but I should remember.  I mean, uh, it's important, really important.  I wonder what it is?  I know I ... geez, you're a pain in the ... yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah ... fine, I'll keep going.”

Hammond shook his head at the ramblings.  This was not the Daniel Jackson he knew.  He was particularly disheartened by subsequent statements the young man had made about believing he had a place on Shyla's world, and that he had never felt like he had fit in or made a difference on Earth.

~Son, you're our most important asset and resource.  I do not understand why you can't see that.~

Hammond closed the reports, and got up.  He put on his blue Air Force blazer, took the preliminary report about Daniel's escape with him, and headed for the security gate.  As he walked, he pondered the events that had occurred since SG-1's return from the planet, especially Sam's encounter with Daniel as she watched him.  This was the discussion he had spoken with Janet about a bit earlier.

“General Hammond, I need to speak with you,” she had said when she entered Hammond's office.  Seeing Jack already there, she had added, “Sir, I'm glad you're here.  You need to know about what just happened with Daniel.”

“Aren't you supposed to be with Daniel, Captain?”

“Yes, Sir, that's why I'm here.”

“Go ahead, Captain,” Hammond had said, noticing that Jack was standing defensively with his arms folded as he leaned against a wall.

“Sir, Daniel was with me for the last forty-five minutes in my lab.  The entire time he was extremely nervous: pacing, fidgeting, unable to stand still for more than a few seconds at a time.  He kept insisting that he wanted to return to P3R-636.  I tried to calm him down, to reason with him, but he wasn't really listening to me.  Another thing I noticed, he seemed forgetful.”

“I've noticed that, too, Sir,” Jack had said sadly from his spot against the wall.

“General, he struggled to remember Sha're's name and acted like he didn't even care about her anymore.  His comments were irrational.  I tried to remind him that his brain chemistry might have been altered, that the sarcophagus was like a narcotic, and he was going through withdrawal, but ...”

Sam had hesitated, taking a deep breath.

“Captain, go on,” Hammond had ordered.

“Yes, Sir.  Sir, he became violent.  He didn't like what I was saying ...”

“What were you saying?” Jack had interrupted, needing to know.

“That Shyla was manipulating him, keeping us slaving away in the mines just to get to him.  He, uh, slammed his fist against the table, causing some supplies to fall onto the floor, and then, he ...”  She had paused, really hating this and yet having no choice.  Her friend needed help desperately.  “He approached me and made some personal comments.  General, the Daniel Jackson we know would never have said anything like that, not in a million years, and ...”

“Out with it, Carter,” Jack had ordered impatiently.

“In all honesty, General, there was a moment when I wasn't sure what Daniel was going to do.  I was ... frightened.”

~That's hard to imagine.  Doctor Jackson is not a violent man, especially not with his teammates.  If there's any one piece of evidence that indicates he needs help, that is it.~

Sam had continued, “Daniel, he was angry.  He shoved several things off the computer table where I was working, and then he walked out.  I hate to admit it, Sir, but I hesitated in following him.  He acted like he needed a fix.”

“What are you saying, Captain?” Hammond had asked.

“Sir, I think he needs to be confined.  He's clearly addicted to the effects ...”

As an airman drove the general's car towards Jack's house, Hammond recalled that that had been the moment when Daniel had burst into his office, resignation in hand, and requested to be allowed to go through the Stargate to Shyla's home world.

~Jack wasn't happy about that.~

Before the conversation had gone on too long, Daniel had collapsed, and a medical team called.  Soon, he had been taken to the infirmary for further testing, the results of which Janet had just covered with the major general before his review of the reports had begun.

~I feel sorry for Doctor Fraiser.  She's close to SG-1.  It can't be easy to tend to a friend, but she's a professional.  'Massive withdrawal' she called it.~  Hammond sighed, remembering Janet's words about only being able to treat the symptoms and her intention to keep Daniel sedated until his body became stable.

He had also heard about the incident in the infirmary when Daniel had tried to pull his IVs out to leave.  He had thrown Teal'c against the wall before being subdued by Jack who had pinned him down to the hospital bed.  That was when they had had a crucial decision to make -- whether or not to return to 636 as Teal'c had suggested and put Daniel into the sarcophagus and hope it helped him to recover, or to simply wait it out, and hope that Janet's treatment of the symptoms did some good.  They had decided to wait it out, and Daniel had responded.  Janet had felt encouraged, only that's when things had really gone crazy.

With Jack watching a monitor from another part of the infirmary, Janet had gone to give Daniel another sedative, only the archaeologist had been awake and, after throwing Janet against a wall, had beat up a guard and ran out.  Jack, who had turned away from the monitor momentarily, looked back and saw Daniel was gone.  He had given chase, finally confronting Daniel in the storeroom.

Hammond had been told that the colonel had walked the young man back to the infirmary several minutes later.  No one really knew what had transpired inside the storeroom, except for the obvious struggle. Storage racks and supplies were all over the floor and the overhead light had been destroyed by a bullet.

~And that brings us to why I'm in this car.~

Hammond pulled out the last report, the one that talked about how Jack had taken Daniel out of the SGC in the wee hours of the morning. He didn't like what he read about the graveyard shift workers involved.

First, the airman assigned to guard Daniel's room had left his post to go to the bathroom and get a snack.  He failed to follow proper procedure completely.  Second, the guard at the last security gate had allowed himself to become distracted by Lou Ferretti.  He admitted to knowing only that two men had left passed through the security gate without setting off the alarms.  He still had no idea who they were.

~This is not acceptable.~  Hammond picked up the phone and called the base, telling Davis to pull the personnel files on the two men and have them waiting for him on his desk.  “And pull Major Ferretti's file as well.”  ~You're involved in this, Major; I can feel it in my bones, but I'm not really worried about you.  Your leader, my 2IC, on the other hand, he's guilty as can be; not sure what to do about him.  This is serious, and I certainly hope he realizes just how serious it is.~

====

Jack heard the knock at the door; then he heard the knock become a pounding; finally, he heard the voice, and it didn't sound happy.

“Colonel O'Neill, if you don't let me in, I'll have the Marines break this door down.”

Sighing, Jack opened the door.  He smiled.

“Morning, General.  What brings you here ...” Jack looked out on the street, “along with the entire United States Air Force?”  ~Not to mention the Marines assigned to us.~

Several Airmen and Marines were on the street, awaiting orders.

Hammond stepped past Jack who was relieved when the Airmen and Marines made no move to do the same.  

“I think you know what, Colonel.  Shut the door.”

Jack coughed.  This was Hammond's stern voice, the one which never failed to remind Jack that his teddy bear of a CO had earned his way to the top by being just as intimidating as Jack could be, maybe even more so.

“Where is he, Colonel?”

“Who, Sir?”  Hammond's glare made Jack swallow.  The jig was up, and Jack knew it.  If he didn't, all he had to do was look out his front door.  “He's upstairs, sleeping, if you can call it that.”

“Jack, are you out of your mind?”

“Sir, with all due respect, I don't care if I am or not.  Daniel asked me to take him out of there.  What lies ahead for him isn't fun.  I ... know what that's like.”

“I know that, but Colonel, you crossed the line here.  Doctor Jackson needs medical attention.  You went against my orders and those of Doctor Fraiser.  I just can't let that go by.”

“I understand that, General.”

“Jack, what is it that you think you're doing?”

“Helping Daniel.”  Jack walked to the counter that separated the living room from the kitchen.  He shook his head, and turned back to face his CO.  “Sir, I know what Daniel needs, and I'm going to make sure he gets it.  I'm asking you to trust me.”

“And what are you going to do if Doctor Jackson's withdrawal becomes critical?”

“If he needs medical attention, I'll call Fraiser.”  Jack decided to up the stakes a little.  “By the way, Daniel had already escaped his room in the infirmary when I found him.”

He didn't need to mention the wayward airman or the lax security officer.  Hammond had already gotten the picture.  They had work to do at the SGC, but that wasn't the subject at hand.

The important issue Jack had just communicated was that Daniel wasn't any safer at the SGC, and that he obviously didn't want to be there and was capable of fighting his way out, with or without Jack.  The archaeologist wanted to recover on his own, and that's what Jack had hoped his comment really reminded the general of.

“I don't like this, Jack.”

“General, the only way you're going to get Daniel out of this house is to set those Airmen and Marines loose.  You'll have to lock me up, Sir.”

Hammond looked at Jack as if he wanted a piece of him himself, but finally, he moved quietly to the door.  He paused, looked back at Jack, and warned, “If this goes south, Jack, I won't be able to help you.”

With that, the general left, taking the servicemen with him.

~There's going to be a big price to pay for this.~

Hearing a noise, Jack headed upstairs to check on Daniel, but was relieved to find he was sleeping, though not very peacefully.

~I don't care what they do to me, Danny.  You come first, and you are worth any price I have to pay to keep you safe.~

====

It was 10 a.m., and Daniel, unable to get comfortable, tossed and turned in the bed he shared with Jack.  He was awake, yet in some strange state of semiconsciousness.  At the moment, he didn't know what was real and what was only in his mind.

Daniel's breathing was heavy, and his chest felt tight, as if he were suffocating.  His throat was dry, but it wasn't water he was desperate for.

Jack had chosen to use the “cold turkey” method of treating Daniel after all.  There wouldn't be any weaning from the drug-like effects of the sarcophagus, and there wouldn't be any more of Janet's pills and drug-infested IVs that only pumped more alien fluids into the younger man.  They'd do it the hard way, regardless of how painful, both physically and emotionally, it was going to be.

“Sarc'agus ... Pills.  Need pills.  JACK, HELP ME!”

“I am, Danny,” Jack said, his voice full of pain as he sat at the side of the bed, trying to calm his lover, his hand combing through Daniel's hair as he spoke.

“No!  Working.  I'm trying.”

“Trying what, Danny?”

Daniel was flashing back to the planet, to a trip down into the mines.  In his mind, he was wearing his royal robes, gazing down at his dirty, sweaty, and tired friends.

“I’m still working on getting you guys out.  Found out ... found out something ... something incredible.”

“Danny ...”

Instead of his name, Daniel heard, “You do know we're dying down here, don't you?”

“No,” Daniel's head continued to thrash from side to side.  He tried to focus his eyes on Jack, but couldn't.  “Did ... research,” he swallowed hard, “on ... the sarcophagus.  It’s amazing what it does to you if you use it when you're already healthy.”

“No, Danny,” Jack said as he moved in even closer to his distraught partner.  He took a damp cloth and pressed it against his lover's forehead.  “The sarcophagus is not something you want to try when you're healthy.”

“No choice.  Shy...Shyla.  Need her to trust me.  Can't ... I can't get Shyla to trust me if I don't show that I trust her.”

“The little witch.”

Again, Daniel heard other words, words Jack had spoken in jealously -- “Oh, Shyla is it now; first name basis.  Shyla.”

“Jealous?  But you wanted to get rid of me,” Daniel sobbed, a sound that tore through Jack's heart.

“No, Danny.”

Daniel ignored the words he never really heard, and in a sudden transformation, went from tears to an eerie but anxious calm.  He was truly drifting in and out between the actual conversation in the mines and the emotional upheaval going on inside him in his present.

“And I've used it before without any side effects, and look -- no glasses!”

Daniel pointed to his eyes.

“No, no glasses,” Jack said softly, realizing his lover's body was with him, but his mind was elsewhere.  “Carter said that the twenty-twenty vision was a side effect.”

Daniel heard, “Daniel, get us out of here,” the words spoken sharply.

“Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah,” Daniel responded to the imaginary voice.  “I’m work...working on it.  Time, Jack.  I just need a little more time.  Sarcophagus ... valuable.  If we do this right, we'll have access to all the naquadah *and* the sarcophagus.”

Jack watched sadly as his lover carried out the conversation that had occurred days earlier.  He knew his 2IC had next asked how many times Daniel had used the Goa'uld lifeline.

“Nine.  Ten.  Nine or ten.  Don't know for sure, but everything is so clear.  I feel like I could do anything.”

“You can, Danny.  You're strong and the most capable man I've ever met.  All you have to do is put your mind to it.  Think, Daniel.  I know you can do it.”

Daniel heard Jack threaten to break out of the mines without him.  He wasn't surprised; he was used to being left behind, but he wouldn't be now.  He'd stay with Shyla if he had to.

“She wants me to marry her,” Daniel said, looking at Jack, but not seeing him.

“Tough.  You're mine.”

Suddenly, Daniel became angry.  He swatted Jack's hands away from him.  Jack remembered that at this point in the conversation, he'd lost his patience with his lover.  He was angry at being confined to the mines, jealous that Daniel seemed to be getting closer to Shyla, and just plain frustrated at not having come up with a plan to escape.  He'd become aggressive and challenging with the archaeologist, but before he could say anything much, Daniel had cut him off.  Jack's heart ached as Daniel struggled to repeat those words now, his face red with his own anger.

“No, *you* look, Jack!  I have got everything under control, okay?  Gawd, you never show me any respect!  Your way didn't work.  Now I'm handling it.  All you guys have to do is hang in there.”

That had been the end of the conversation, and Jack hoped Daniel would settle down now that the memory had been replayed and run its course.

“Respect; no respect.  Let me do it.  I can get them out.  They're my friends.  Isn't there someone I should remember?”

“Daniel, come on, Love; snap out of it.”

“Supposed to 'member someone.  Can't ... Sha're ... Shyla wants me.  No, not Sha're.  Who?  Can't remember now.”

“I'll help you.”

“Help me remember?”

“Oh yeah.”  Daniel had calmed, and Jack began to see recognition again in the blue eyes he treasured.  “You with me, Love?”

“Jack?”

The older man smiled, and leaned forward to place a gentle kiss on Daniel's lips.

“Remember?”  Daniel nodded.  “Forever, Danny.  You and I are forever.  I love you.”

“I love you, too,” Daniel said, blinking several times and his eyes misting a bit.

“Danny?”  He saw he had his lover's attention, so Jack continued, speaking firmly.  “I respect you more than I've ever respected another living soul.  Do you hear me?”  Daniel nodded.  “No, Danny, I want you to say it.”

“You ... you, uh ...”

“I respect you.  Say it.”

Daniel shook his head and rolled over onto his right side.  Jack closed his eyes.  He prayed it was just Daniel's whacked-up system that was causing this bout of insecurity, but if not, he vowed to make sure Daniel knew how much Jack not only respected, but admired him.

“I love you, Danny.”

“Love you, too,” Daniel said.

Jack ran his hand gently up and down Daniel's side and then his back.

“You rest, Love.  Close your eyes.  Dream good things; only good things.”

====

“Col...collllld, J'ck.  I'm so cold,” Daniel spoke, his lips quivering as he spoke.

Jack saw the goose bumps all over his lover's body and placed yet another blanket over the younger man.  They'd gotten through lunch, if it could be called that.  Daniel had eaten some soup and then had rested for an hour or so.  After that, Daniel had awakened and was restless, not wanting to lay still.  Jack had sat with him, even reading the first few chapters of “The Adventures of Tom Sawyer” which, amazingly enough, seemed to still Daniel's anxiety for a while.  Suddenly, though, the archaeologist had begun to have bouts of cold flashes like the one he was currently having.

“It'll pass.”

“Sick.  I feel sick.”

“I'm sorry, Love,” Jack said as he made sure the blanket was snug around Daniel.

“I'm ... going to ... oh ...”  It was too late.  Daniel vomited all over the blanket and himself.  “Gawd,” he said afterwards, feeling incredibly forlorn.

“It's okay.”

“Don't leave me, Jack.  Please don't leave me,” Daniel cried.

“Danny,” Jack said, his voice shocked that Daniel would think he would bolt over a little bodily gunk.  “I'm not going anywhere, except to get some towels and things to clean this up.”

Daniel blinked several times, and Jack saw such vulnerability there.  If he'd had time, he would have pursued it -- the fear in Daniel's eyes, but right now, he had other things to do.

Jack tended to his Love.  Fortunately, the snug blanket had taken the worst of it, and the bedding and mattress were unscathed.  Jack helped his lover put on dry pajamas, and scooted him over to the other side of the bed.

With the area cleaned, Jack sat at the edge of the bed next to Daniel.  With his right hand, he caressed his lover's cheek.

“I love you so much.”  It was a simple declaration of love, but for Daniel, with his emotions all out of whack, he lost control, sobbing as he heard the words.  “Oh, Danny,” Jack said softly.

He pulled his lover up to hold him in his arms and placed a kiss on the side of his neck.  Daniel's cries increased, and he clung to Jack, making sure the older man couldn't move.

~Not going anywhere.  Geez, Danny, hasn't anyone ever held you before?  Sometimes I think you've never been hugged ... ever, except maybe by your parents.  My parents held me all the time.  Danny, My Danny.  I'll hold you forever if that's what you want; I'm not going anywhere.~

Jack held Daniel until the young man finally fell asleep, and then he gently lay his lover to rest on the bed.  Jack readjusted the sheets, then leaned forward to place a chaste kiss on Daniel's forehead.  His fingers traced Daniel's eyes, then his nose, and finally his lips.

“You're so beautiful, Danny, and you're mine.  I love you, and soon, very soon, this is going to seem like a miserable dream.  I'm going to take you away from here for a while.  Maybe the Bahamas; I don't know, but someplace warm.  I'm going to watch you bask in the sun and walk on the beach, and so help me, Daniel, I'm going to see you smile.  When this is over, that's what we're going to do.”

====

“Colonel, please.  Let me at least come and examine him,” Janet requested over the phone the next morning.

She hadn't been the least bit happy when General Hammond had arrived back at the SGC without Daniel in tow.  The petite physician had gone on the warpath, but fortunately for Jack and Daniel, Hammond's orders had stopped her from taking a band of Marines to forcibly retrieve the archaeologist.

“No.”

“You don't know what you're dealing with.”

~Yes, I do, more than you know.~  “I'm monitoring his vital signs, Doctor Fraiser.  What Daniel needs isn't to be hooked up to IVs with nurses gawking at him.  He needs ... he needs to be just where he is.”

“Jack,” Janet tried to make it a more personal discussion.  She was desperate to get him to understand the risks of keeping Daniel away from proper medical care.  “Daniel could suffer a number of side effects, even cardiac arrest.  You have to let me see him.”

“Thank you for your concern, Doctor Fraiser,” Jack responded, keeping it formal, “but don't call us, we'll call you.”

Jack hung up the phone.  He knew way more than Janet knew he did about the subject, and he knew Daniel better than anyone else did.  Yes, there were risks, but they were risks he was willing to take.  He was just glad that Hammond seemed to be ignoring his little archaeologist-napping for the time being.  Jack knew, though, that once Daniel was better, Hammond would haul him through the fire for it.

~Doesn't matter.  When Danny is better, he can do whatever he likes to me.~

====

It seemed like days, but it had only been thirty-one hours since Jack had brought Daniel home.  Jack leaned against the dresser in his bedroom and brought the palms of his hands to his face, rubbing up and down for a moment.  He took a giant breath, and slowly lowered his hands until his fingers were just covering his lips and chin.

He stared at Daniel lying on their bed, restlessly moving about, his legs and arms twitching in nervous motions.  The older man knew their ordeal was far from over; he also knew that sooner or later, he was going to have to get some sleep.  Since bringing Daniel home, he'd gotten very little, just scattered catnaps.

Jack shoved himself away from the dresser and walked the width of the room.  He turned and walked back over to the dresser, then raised his arms to stretch, desperately trying to wake up his numb body.

All of sudden, Jack saw a blur out of the corner of his eye.  He turned towards the bed just in time to see his lover charging towards him.

“Daniel!”  The younger man tackled the older, and they fell to ground, struggling for control.  “What the blazes are you doing?  DANIEL!”

“I have to get to the Stargate; have to go home.”

“Home?” Jack tried to roll them over, but the adrenaline in Daniel's system had given the archaeologist incredible temporary strength.  “Daniel, stop!”

“Shyla needs me; her people need me.”

“Shyla is a demonic witch, a spoiled brat that left Carter, Teal'c, and I to die in a hellhole disguised as a mine while she stuffed you in a Goa'uld torture chamber.”

“She saved my life,” Daniel argued.

He scrambled off Jack and made a break for the door, but Jack leaped up, managing to grab hold of Daniel's white pajama bottoms.  Then he grabbed onto Daniel's legs as he worked to get a more stable grip.  The younger man tried to shake himself free, twisting and turning his body. Spying Jack's coat on a chair, he managed to grab it and use it as a weapon, striking Jack with it in the face.

“OW!  DANIEL, FOR CRYING OUT LOUD!”

Daniel broke free, and Jack scrambled to catch him, doing so at the top of the stairs.  Again the two fought, coming close to falling down the stairs until Jack managed to push Daniel back towards the wall, finally pinning him there.

“Daniel, look at me.  Shyla isn't worth it.”

“I kissed her.  What do I tell Sha're?  First, Hathor, then Shyla.  I've cheated on my wife over and over again.”

“No, you haven't.”  ~Geez, what did I just say?  Crap!~  “Danny, listen.  Hathor raped you.”

“Should have been stronger.”

“There was nothing you could have done.”

“YOU WEREN'T THERE!  You don't know how it feels to be ... to not be able to ... gawd, what she did to me,” Daniel cried.  Then, just as suddenly as the tears had begun, they stopped.  Daniel's entire demeanor changed.  His face grew tight.  “WHAT HAVE YOU DONE WITH SHA'RE?  SHE'S MY WIFE, AND I DEMAND YOU GIVE HER BACK TO ME!”

“I don't have her, Danny, or I would.”

“YOU STOLE HER!  YOU LYING ... SNAKE!” Daniel said, surprising Jack by kicking him in the leg, causing enough pain that Jack's own knee gave out.

~Snake?  Geez, he thinks I'm Apophis.~

Jack groaned as he straightened himself up after the shocking blow to his body.  Daniel hadn't run this time, but was sliding along the wall, his hands trying to grip the wall.  It looked to Jack as if Daniel thought he was on a ledge.

“Have to jump.  Sha're.  She's gone.  Nothing left to live for.”

Slowly, Jack approached Daniel until he stood in front of him again.

“Danny, look at me.  Look into my eyes.  We'll get Sha're back.  I promise.  Soon.  We'll find her and bring her home.  Look at me, Danny.”

“Jack?”

The word was soft.  For a moment, Jack thought they had finished with this crisis, especially when Daniel reached out to touch Jack's cheek.  There was a tiny cut there.

“I hurt you.”

“Nah, my face was just in the wrong place.”

“The coat.  I'm sorry,” the young man said, guilt consuming him as he realized the zipper to Jack's coat had hit his lover in the face, causing the small cut to happen.

Jack smiled sweetly and enjoyed the tender feel of Daniel's hand against his skin.

“I can't do this.  I'm not strong enough,” Daniel whined.

“Yes, you can.  You *are*.”

“No, I'm a failure.  I deserve a life with Shyla.  It hurts.  My hands.  My stomach.  My feet.  It all hurts.  I need the pain to go away.  Have to go away,” he said, darting to his right and running down the stairs.

Daniel flew into a painful rage as he ran.

“PAIN HURTS TOO MUCH.  WANT IT TO STOP.  CAN'T DO THIS.  I NEED SOMETHING, ANYTHING!”

He tore through the kitchen, opening drawers and clearing shelves, hoping to find some kind of drugs, but finding nothing.  Jack watched helplessly from a distance.

“Daniel, this will pass.  We'll ...”

“SHUT UP, JACK.  YOU HAVE NO CLUE WHAT IS GOING ON INSIDE ME.  YOU DON'T KNOW HOW MY GUTS FEEL LIKE THEY ARE GOING TO EXPLODE.  EVERYTHING'S CHURNING.  YOU LIKE MOVIES, JACK?  THINK THE EXORCIST BECAUSE THAT'S HOW I FEEL, LIKE MY HEAD IS SPINNING COMPLETELY AROUND, AND I'M GOING TO SPIT OUT GREEN PUKE!  YOU DO *NOT* KNOW HOW I FEEL.  STOP PATRONIZING ME!”

In a furor, Daniel ran past Jack to the fireplace.  He was like a madman, his eyes wide and wild.  In one fell swoop, he shoved everything off the mantel as he shouted, “YOU DON'T LOVE ME.  IF YOU DID, YOU'D HELP ME.  YOU'D GIVE ME SOMETHING INSTEAD OF STANDING THERE WATCHING ME LIKE I'M SOME FREAK.”

Then, Daniel looked down.  He saw the picture frame crash against the bricks of the fireplace.  It felt like everything was moving in slow motion.  He could see every fracture of the glass happening, the flecks of broken glass bouncing up and around the photo, and the wooden frame cracking as it bounced up and down several times.

“Charlie ... oh, gawd ... Charlie.”  He knelt down, the palms of his hands and knees on the floor.  Daniel didn't even register the pain as pieces of glass cut through his left hand as he leaned against them, staring at the photo.  “I'm so sorry, Charlie,” he cried, picking up the broken frame with glass jutting from it, and pressing it to his chest.

“DANIEL!”

Jack panicked, worried the glass would cut into Daniel's chest, but also afraid of scaring his lover.  If Daniel moved forward or stood up and took a step without paying attention, he might step on the broken glass.  The young man was still clad only in his pajamas, and his feet were bare.

Daniel rocked back and forth in rapid, abbreviated motions.

“Sorry, so sorry.  Charlie, I'm sorry,” he chanted over and over again.

Jack worked his way quietly behind his lover.

“It's okay, Danny,” he said, kneeling down behind him.  “Shhh, Love.  Charlie's not mad.  It's okay.”  Jack cautiously placed his hands on Daniel's shoulders and rubbed gently, slowly lowering his hands to rub the young man's back.  “It's only a frame, Daniel.  It can be replaced, but you can't.  I need you, Danny.  I love you.”

Daniel continued to rock himself, gripping the photo tightly.  Jack could see his lover's fingers pressing hard against the broken frame.

“Sorry, Charlie.  I didn't mean it.  Jack loves you.  He loves you so much.”

“Yes, I do,” Jack said, as he inched his arms to wrap around Daniel's abdomen, resting just below where Daniel cradling the photo.  “And I love you, too, Danny.  Let me see your hand,” Jack requested as he moved his left hand up to try and take Daniel's.

One step at a time, almost moving at half-speed, Jack carefully pried Charlie's photo out of Daniel's hands and placed it on the floor.  He used the end of the frame to sweep away the biggest pieces of glass, and then he took Daniel's hands, careful to avoid the places where they were cut, and used them to pull Daniel up.

“Watch your step.  That's it.  Let's go over here,” Jack said, guiding his lover to the sofa.  Daniel seemed to be in a trance-like state, not saying anything as he sat down and stared straight ahead.  “Stay here, Danny. Don't move.”

Jack hurried to the kitchen and retrieved a first-aid kit from a drawer.  Then he sat next to Daniel and cleaned the tiny cuts, applying some ointment, and wrapping a gauze bandage around the palm of Daniel's hand when he was done.  Although none of the cuts were big or deep, there were quite a lot of them, and Jack felt that the large bandage was the best way, at least in the short term, of protecting Daniel's hand.

“I'm sorry, Jack,” the young man said when Jack was finished.

“You have nothing to be sorry for.”

“I've made a mess of everything.  Let me go.  Please let me go.”

“Can't do that.  I love you.”

“My hands are shaking.  If you love me, give me something to make this stop.  You must have something to make this pain go away.”

“Look, Danny, I won't lie to you.  Things are going to get worse before they get better, but they *will* get better.”

“Jack,” Daniel began to cry, and in less than five seconds, Jack had moved to the edge of the sofa and taken Daniel into his arms.

There, they sat and snuggled for quite a while.  It was one of the few peaceful times they'd had.  Daniel was still shaking, but he was lucid, though filled with sorrow and regret.

“I feel so guilty.  Sha're trusted me.  I let Hathor ...”

“You didn't let Hathor do anything, Daniel.”

“She's just a woman, Jack.”

“She's a Goa'uld, and she poisoned our minds with that drug.”

“Shyla.  Gawd, I kissed her, right in front of you.  I forgot about us.  How could I have done that?”

“It was the sarcophagus, Danny.  Carter says that thing is dangerous.  It messes with your mind, like a narcotic, and that little witch made you use it when you didn't need it.  It was like one great big giant high.”

“I'm so weak; should have fought her; should have stayed in control.”

“You're one of the strongest people I know, Love.”

“I don't feel like it.”

“It's the drug,” Jack said, his hands massaging his lover's abdomen as Daniel leaned against him.

“Hold me, Jack,” Daniel requested, not really feeling the warm arms already wrapped around him.

“I have you, Love.”

“Tighter.  Don't let go.”

“I won't,” Jack said, squeezing Daniel to him.

====

“No, Carter, you can't come over ... For one thing, he's finally asleep ... Look, Daniel wants to be left alone; he doesn't want anyone to see him until he's feeling better, and I aim to see that his wishes are followed ... Thanks, I'll let you know if I need anything.  Goodnight.”

Jack hung up the phone and went to the sofa where Daniel had fallen asleep two hours earlier.  He sat down and just looked at his lover, once again memorizing every inch of the younger man.  It was something Jack did frequently.

Twenty minutes later, Daniel awoke.  Jack hand fed him some more soup and led him back upstairs.

“Guess we'd better get some new pajamas for you.”

“Why?”

“These are torn,” Jack said.

Daniel twisted to look behind him.

“I can't tell.”

“Trust me.  Nice big hole here.  Of course, it does have its advantages,” Jack said, slipping three fingers inside the hole, making contact with Daniel's butt and pinching it for effect.

“Oh,” Daniel smiled.

It was his first genuine smile in days, and it warmed Jack's heart.

Once Daniel had changed into a fresh pair of pajamas, Jack helped him into bed.  He placed a kiss on his lips and then pulled the covers over him.

“Aren't you coming to bed?”

Daniel's vulnerability showed again, his eyes searching Jack's soul.

“Sure, I am.  Be right back.”

Jack readied himself for bed and then got in under the covers.

“Hold me, Jack.”

“That's the plan,” he answered as he took his Daniel blanket into his arms.

Jack sighed.  He was a pillow for the first time in several days, and he loved it.  He prayed Daniel would sleep peacefully; he knew he would not, full of worry, and having to be on guard in case Daniel suffered some kind of episode before morning.

“I love you, Daniel.”

“I love you, too, Jack.”

====

“Hurts.  Help me.  GIVE ME SOMETHING!” Daniel demanded as he held his hands to his abdomen.

“I'm sorry, Danny, but you said you didn't want more drugs.  I promise you, it will get better.”

The young man was experiencing cramps, both in his abdomen and legs.  His muscles had gone through periodic spasms, but this was the most severe physical reaction he'd had thus far.

“You don't know.”  Jack started to say he did, but Daniel interrupted him.  “AND STOP SAYING YOU DO.  You don't.  You don't know what this feels like.  You've never been like this.”

“Daniel, I told you I had.”

“NO, YOU'RE LYING.  YOU JUST WANT ME TO FEEL SORRY FOR YOU.  POOR JACK!  YOU DON'T LOVE ME!”

“Yes, I do.”

“IF YOU LOVED ME, YOU'D GIVE ME SOMETHING FOR THE PAIN.  I HURT.  CAN'T YOU GET THAT THROUGH YOUR FAT HEAD?”

Jack continued to try and comfort the younger man.  He refused to let Daniel push him away, and he knew the hurtful words coming from his lover weren't Daniel, but the withdrawal.  Things would improve, eventually.

====

Exhausted, Jack sat back in a dining room chair that he had brought up from downstairs.  He had placed the chair in front of the closed door.  He didn't know how much longer he could stay awake, but he felt like he had to try.  Daniel's withdrawal had been bad thus far, worse than the older man had anticipated.  His lover had bouts of violence which were followed by guilt and depression, neither of which helped him to battle the physical effects of the withdrawal.  Jack considered calling in backup, but he had made a promise to the younger man.

~No one will see you like this.  I won't let them.~

He yawned and fought to keep his eyes open, but then he looked at the younger man sprawled out on the bed.  The sight of Daniel, with sweat still rolling down his body as he tossed and turned, his body having momentary convulsions, woke him up like nothing else could have.

~Danny, I love you, and there will be an end to this.  I know you can't see it, but we'll get there.  You're already better.  This is bad, but at least you know me now.  Geez, I almost died down in that mine when I realized you'd forgotten about us.  That was so hard.  It started when Carter had that dream.  She woke up realizing that the sarcophagus was dangerous, addictive.  That's when I had to see you.  I had to ask three times to see you, Danny -- three friggin' times.  I couldn't understand why.  I do now.  You'd been suffering from the effects of a drug we can't define or understand; those dang sarcs -- they're lethal to us.~

Jack stared at his lover, as he recalled the last day on the planet, and their first days back on Earth.

//Flashback//
“You know, I can walk by myself,” Jack snipped at the Jaffa as they dragged him from the mine to the throne room.  Then he saw Daniel, dressed in royal robes, sitting on the large throne at the head of the room.  ~I don't believe it.~  “The man who would be king.”

“Hi, Jack!  Hi, Jack.  Ha Ha … hijack!”

Daniel laughed at the combination of Jack's name and the greeting to make the word 'hijack' as he moved from the throne to sit on the huge pedestal that the throne sat on.  He seemed unusually tickled by it.

The archaeologist snapped his fingers at the Jaffa, motioning for them to leave.  Jack was on his knees, several feet in front of his lover.  He coughed, but Daniel didn't react, not showing any concern at either the cough or Jack's weakened condition.  Instead, Daniel just stared while nervously moving his legs back and forth.

“We’re losing the battle down there, you know.  Carter's started having, um, Goa’uld flashbacks; says if you keep using the sarcophagus, you're going to dark side on us, if you haven't already.”

Daniel wasn't phased by the comments, and spoke with an upbeat tone of voice.

“Well, don't worry a bit.  We’re getting out of here tomorrow.”

“What?”

As if he had solved a giant puzzle, Daniel answered nonchalantly, “I agreed to marry her.”

“You did?”

Jack couldn't believe what he had heard, nor the look of emptiness in Daniel's eyes.  It wasn't that Daniel didn't know him, but something was missing that Jack couldn't put his finger on.

“But ...” Daniel jumped off the pedestal and moved to Jack.  He helped him to stand up, putting his left arm around Jack's shoulder, and continued.  “I said I had to go home and straighten a few things out first, and you guys are coming with me.”

Jack saw the giant smile on Daniel's face.  He didn't understand what was happening to his lover.  He asked, “And she trusts you?”

Daniel took a giant breath and answered with pride, “She … *loves* me.”

Jack paused, still not believing the way Daniel was talking.

~Danny, you're not talking like this is an escape plan, you're talking like you plan on going through with it.~  “Daniel, you aren't serious.”

“Why not?”

“You don't really want to marry her.”

“She's beautiful, Jack.”

“She's a *WITCH*, Daniel.”

“You just don't understand her,” Daniel argued, moving a few feet to the left of his lover.

“SHE'S A WITCH, Daniel!”

“She's wonderful.  She's beautiful and intelligent, and she needs me.  She loves me, Jack.”

“Okay,” Jack walked towards Daniel.  “Let's just forget that you're already married.  You *do* remember, Sha're, don't you?”

“Of course, I do,” Daniel said, turning and walking away a couple of steps.  He folded his arms and turned back to face Jack.  “But she's gone.  It's been a year.  Shyla is here, and ... there are things I could do here.”

“Do?”

“I can make a difference.”

“You make a difference on Earth.  Daniel,” Jack walked closer to the younger man, “what about us?”

“Us?  We're friends.  You don't have anything to do with who I marry.”

“Daniel, I mean ... us ... as in *us*.”

“Jack, what are you talking about?”

“Never mind.  Let's get out of here.”  ~I hope you're just playing dumb.~  **Danny, you're just pretending, right?**

There was no response.  Jack tried several more times, but apparently, one of the side effects of the sarcophagus was that their telepathic-like communication wasn't working.  Jack hoped it was temporary.  Even if he didn't understand it, he enjoyed their silent exchanges.  At the moment, though, the inability to share silent thoughts with Daniel was the least of Jack's problems.

Not quite an hour later, SG-1 stood at the foot of the Stargate.  Shyla stood arrogantly in front of the team, but addressed Jack.
 
“My father once was the greatest of men, but he can rule no longer.  He lives only to see me married.  I extend the sincerest of apologies for the hardship done to you and offer the friendship of our world.”

~Witch.~  “Well, thanks.”  ~And don't invite me to the wedding.  I can tell you right now that it ISN'T going to happen.  And your hospitality has been underwhelming.~

“Please know that from now on you will always be welcome here and will be treated with the utmost respect.”

~Go with the devil, Witch.~

Jack and Teal'c walked towards the Stargate while Sam began to dial the Gate.  Daniel moved to Shyla and kissed her, then said, “I'll be back, soon.”

**Danny, what are you doing?**  Again, there was no reaction from the younger man.  Jack fought down his jealousy, reminding himself that Daniel didn't know what he was doing.  ~I'm going to kill her if we don't get off this planet now.~

They walked through the Stargate and down to the foot of the ramp where General Hammond was waiting.

“We had a nice time, Sir.  Carter picked up some naquadah, Teal'c made some new friends as usual, Daniel got engaged, and, um, I'm gonna hit the showers.”  ~And then I might kill someone.~

====

Jack watched Daniel from the shower stall he was using.  He couldn't help but notice that the younger man wasn't sneaking him any glances. They always did that ... little looks, silent words, tiny smiles.  They couldn't do anything obvious, but their well-known 'best friends' camaraderie afforded them some freedom.

Instead, all he saw was Daniel acting a bit more hyper than usual.  He recognized the 'wired' movements, but hoped he was just imagining it, that perhaps it was just the stress of the events on Shyla's home world.

After they dressed, they headed for the infirmary.  Hammond had postponed the debriefing until the following morning, based on Jack's recommendation.  During the post-mission exams, Daniel was unusually fidgety.

“Daniel, there's something wrong here,” Janet said, monitoring his vital signs.

“I'm fine, Janet.”

“No, I don't think so.”

“What's wrong, Doc?” Jack asked, jumping off the exam table he'd been sitting on and walking towards the two.

“I need to do more tests, but I think the sarcophagus has affected Daniel's system.”

“I'm FINE,” he insisted, jumping off the table and starting to leave.

“Whoa, Daniel,” Jack said, running to cut off his lover.  He put his hands on Daniel's shoulder and stared into his eyes.  It startled him.  In many ways, Jack felt like he was looking at a stranger.  “You're staying here until the Doc clears you to leave.”

“I'm fine, Jack.”

“Fine.  I'm glad you're fine, Daniel, but you're not leaving here until Doctor Fraiser says you can.”

“Fine!” Daniel responded, pushing away from Jack and pacing the infirmary.

“Colonel, I need to do some more tests.  I don't think Daniel should be left alone.”

Jack sighed, “You need help handling him?”

“I'm going to call in the heavyweights,” the physician said softly, adding, “just in case, unless you and Teal'c want to stay.  I hate to agitate him, Colonel.”

“I'll stay while you do the tests, but then I have to meet with Hammond.  After that, Carter can stay with him for a while.”

Janet nodded, and motioned to one of the nurses to join her.

“Daniel, we need to do some tests.”

Daniel was about to protest, but he saw Jack and Teal'c staring at him.

“Fine,” the archaeologist said angrily, submitting to the tests grudgingly.

Afterwards, Jack told Sam and Teal'c to get something to eat.  Hammond had pushed back their meeting thirty minutes, so Jack said he'd stay with Daniel until then.

Daniel continued to pace rapidly across the expanse of the infirmary floor.  He picked up a pillow and squeezed it; then he looked at Jack.

“What are you looking at?”

“My best friend.”

Daniel stared, but said nothing.  He tossed the pillow back onto the bed.

“I want to go back.”

“No, you don't.  There's nothing for you there.”

“Shyla's there.”

“You don't love her.”

“How would you know?  What makes you think you know everything?”

“I don't, but I know you, and I know that right now you're suffering from the effects of the sarcophagus.”  **Danny?  Don't you remember?  Can't you hear me?**

The lack of response saddened Jack.

“You can't keep me here, Jack.”

Jack walked into Daniel's personal space.

“You can't tell me you really want to go back to that planet.”

“I can, and I do.”

“Why?”

“I love her.”

“What about us?”  Jack reached out to touch his lover, but Daniel unconsciously backed away, startling the older man.  “We're nothing?”

“Why do you keep asking me that?  We're friends, Jack, but that doesn't mean that you can meddle in my private affairs.”

“Friends?  Meddle?”  Jack shook his head in disbelief.  “We're ... friends.”

“Okay, best friends.  You should be happy for me.  What's your problem, Jack?”

“Nothing,” Jack responded softly, the truth hitting him like a ton of bricks.  Daniel truly didn't remember that they were in love.  ~I have to get out of here.~ He started to leave, but remembered he couldn't.  Regardless of his own hurt, he had to make sure Daniel was safe.  “So, Daniel, when we go home ...”

“Jack, when Janet releases me, I'm going home, and I'm going to pack, and then I'm going to come back here and go through the Stargate.  I'm sorry you're having a hard time with that, but that's how it is.”

“You're going home?”

“Gawd, Jack, what's your problem?  Yes, I'm going home, to pack.”

“You're going to the apartment?”

Daniel felt exasperated.

~Just leave me alone.~  “Yes, Jack, it's where I live.  Gawd, I think it's you who has a problem here; not me.”

“What about me?”

“What about you?  Look, thank you for being a friend, Jack, but Shyla is more than a friend, and I'm going back.  You can find someone else to watch boring hockey games and eat cold pizza with.”

“I see,” Jack said, both stunned and saddened.

He was on the verge of losing Daniel forever if he didn't do something, and fast.  The only problem was that he hadn't a clue what to do.

“Sir,” Sam interrupted, “I'm back.”

Jack looked at Sam.  Normally, he would have questioned her early return, but at the moment, he was grateful for it; he needed to escape.

“Stay with him, Captain.  Do not let him leave.  I'll be with General Hammond.”

Jack looked at Daniel one last time, and then headed for the general's office.
//End of Flashback//

~That's when things really went south.  You scared Carter out of her mind, and that's not easy to do.  She didn't even recognize you.  Imagine that, Danny.  You actually frightened Carter to the point where you had her cringing and shaking.  You're going to feel so guilty about that when this is over.~

Jack got up from his chair and walked to the bed.  He placed his hand on Daniel's clammy cheek.

“I love you, Danny.”

“Jack?”

“Yeah, it's me.  I'm sorry.  I didn't think you'd wake up.”

“Hard to sleep.”

“I know.  I love you.”  Jack was desperate to hear the words, but he wouldn't ask; instead, he'd keep saying them over and over again, knowing that Daniel was insecure and needed Jack to say them first.  “I love you so friggin' much.”

“I love you, too.”  Jack smiled, and even through the mucky haze that currently filled his mind, Daniel knew what his lover was thinking about.  “I'm sorry, Jack.  I'm sorry I forgot.”

“It wasn't you, Love; it was that thing.”

“I hurt you.”

“No, it was that thing,” Jack repeated, his hand continuing to caress Daniel's cheek.

Daniel raised his left hand to take hold of Jack's.  Though Daniel's hand was shaking, he held on and then kissed the center of Jack's palm.  He leaned his cheek into Jack's hand and closed his eyes.

“Love you so much, Jack.  Sorry, so sorry.”

“Come here, you,” Jack said, moving to sit against the headboard of the bed and pulling his lover to lay atop him.  Jack's fingers ran through Daniel's long hair.  He leaned down and placed a kiss on Daniel's head. “I love you so much.  We're going to get through this.”

“How?” Daniel began to cry, losing control of his emotions.  “I can't do this, Jack.  I have no control over anything; I need to be in control; it's all I have.”

“You have me.”  He heard the sniffling of the younger man and placed another kiss on his head.  “You can get through this; it just takes time.  I'm here; we're together, and together, we're unbeatable.”

“Too hard.”

“No, Love.  You'll see, but right now, you need to rest.  Close your eyes.”

“Don't leave.”

“Never, not ever.”

Daniel's head lay on Jack's lap, tears running down his face.  He was tormented by the knowledge of the hurt he had caused Jack.  He'd suffered amnesia, and it wasn't until Jack held him in the storeroom of the SGC during his escape attempt that his memory had come flooding back.  He had almost shot not just his best friend, but his soulmate, and that knowledge was now infesting Daniel like a plague eating away at his body.

~My fault.  Hurt him.  Gawd, no.  I almost killed him.~

The young man's mind raced remembering how he had almost shot the man he cherished more than life.

//Flashback//
~I have to get free.  Escape.  Get back to Shyla.  Don't want to be here. They're all against me.  You're against me, Janet.~

From his private room, Daniel plotted his next move.  He heard Janet enter the room, and then he heard her say, “Okay, Daniel” as she used her penlight to check Daniel's pupil reactions.

With a burst of anger and strength, Daniel broke free of his restraints, grabbed Janet, and threw her over the top of his body to the other side of the room.

The Special Forces officer on guard heard the commotion, but was no match for the hyped-up archaeologist who beat the guard with his fist several times.

~Have to get to the Stargate before they hurt me.~  Daniel fled the room that was a prison to him.  ~Where do I go?  Just run.  Must run.~

In another part of the infirmary, Jack's internal Daniel alarm blared.  He turned to look at a nearby monitor and saw the empty bed where his lover had been just minutes earlier.  Quickly, he ran to the room.

Janet had gotten up and was exiting the private room.  She told Jack she was okay.  He hit the alarm button, setting off the loud alarm within the SGC and gave chase.

**Daniel, stop!**  Jack had to attempt it, but there still wasn't any response.  ~Come on, Daniel.  How far do you think you'll get anyway?~

Jack followed Daniel to a darkened storeroom.  He flipped on the light switch and carefully looked around.  He was shocked when a bullet flew by, hitting the overhead lighting, the bulb exploding over Jack's head.

“Geez, Daniel!  Are you trying to kill me?” he called out after taking cover.  ~And where did you get the gun?  The guard.  We really need to improve military training.~

“You're trying to kill me,” the young man accused from across the room.

~Okay, let's try the military approach; see if they can get something right.~  “There'll be guards here in thirty seconds.”

“I'm going back.”

~No, you're not.  And no they can't get anything right.  Who's in charge of training around here anyway?~  “You don't have to.  Fraiser says you're getting better.”

~I want to believe you.~  “You're lying!”

“Why would I do that?”  **For crying out loud, I love you, Danny!**

**No!**

Jack's momentary thrill at hearing the silent communication ended when he saw Daniel take off, trying to flee the room.  Jack moved swiftly to stop his lover, tackling him to the floor.  They struggled in a fierce battle to gain control of the other, knocking down storage racks as they wrestled.

Jack was surprised by Daniel's strength, though he realized it was a result of what Janet called “the sarcophagus drug” in his system; it made him that much more difficult to handle.

Finally, Daniel managed to break free.  He sat against the wall near the door and aimed the pistol he had taken from the SF at Jack.  He looked crazed, his eyes wide and his hair straggled and sweat-soaked from their fight.

“Daniel!  What are you going to do, Daniel?  Do you want to kill me?”  Jack saw the gun wavering in the younger man's hands.  His hold wasn't tight.  He could hear Daniel's labored breathing.  He paused, giving his lover a chance to put down the weapon.  “Look at you.  I know what this is.  I know what it's like.  You can get through it.”  **I love you.**

Daniel was crying, unable to accept both what he was doing and what Jack was saying to him.  The conflict was tearing him apart.  His mind couldn't comprehend the truth, nor even the lies of his paranoia.

“No,” Daniel said, shaking his head, breaking down.

Jack watched in agony.  Daniel was truly at the end of his rope, and he looked it.  He waved his left hand in front of his face a couple of times, like a baby swatting at nothing.

**I love you, Danny.**

**Love?  Me?  No!  No, you don't.**

**Oh, yes, I do.  You're my life.  I love you, Space Monkey.**

Daniel's mind processed his thoughts as silent messages to Jack.  He didn't realize he was doing it, but slowly, the connections that had snapped loose fused back together.  He was Jack's Space Monkey, his falling star, his love.

**Space ... Mon...key.  Falling Star.  Jack?  Jack, I love you.  Gawd, I love you.**

**Yes, Danny.  My beautiful falling star.  Mine, all mine.**

The cries became more desperate, and Jack moved forward.  Daniel still held the gun in his right hand, but it was limp in his hand.  He leaned forward, crying in frustrating sobs.

Reaching Daniel, Jack grabbed hold of the gun with his right hand while leaning forward on his knees to comfort his lover.  His left arm circled around Daniel's back to hold the young man to him.  Jack gently placed the gun on the floor and brought his right hand to Daniel's head, allowing Daniel to cry into his shoulder.  He rocked his lover back and forth as he hugged him, saying nothing for several seconds.  He rubbed his back and held him as close as he could.

Not for one moment did Jack think about the security cameras or the personnel that were quickly approaching the area.  Jack's entire universe was in his arms, and he had but one goal, one purpose, at the moment -- to comfort the man he loved more than life.

He'd never seen Daniel so distraught, but Jack knew what it was like, and somehow, he vowed to get them through this latest disaster.

“It's okay, Danny.”

“Gawd, I for...forgot.”

“Shhh.”  **I love you.  Can you hear me?  I love you, Daniel.  We will get through this.**

**Lost, so lost, Jack.  Can't ... think.**

**It's okay.  I'll think for both of us.  Trust me.**  “Trust me, Daniel.”

“Don't let them see me, Jack; they'll laugh.  I want to go home.  Please.”

~Laugh?  Not if they want to live.~  “I don't think the Doc would approve.”

“Take me home.  Please take me home.  I want to go...go home.”

“Shh.  Relax, Danny.  Everything will be all right.  You'll see.”

“I want to die,” he wailed.

“No, you don't.”  **We have a forever to live.**

“Sir,” Sam called out, three Marines behind her.

“Carter, get them out of here,” Jack barked.

Sam motioned for the Marines to stand back and away from the storeroom.  She looked at Jack holding Daniel, and she saw how the archaeologist was clinging to him.  There was something different about this.  It wasn't the colonel protecting a member of his team.  It wasn't one best friend protecting another.

~You *are* together.  Holy Hannah!  I'm right.~  Sam looked nervously at the Marines and back at her CO.  Daniel's head was lying on Jack's shoulder and Jack's chin was buried in Daniel's hair.  ~What do I do?~

“Shh, Danny, it'll be okay,” Jack whispered.

“Scared.  Can't do this, Jack.”

“Yes, you can.  We can.  Together.  We *can* and we will.”

“Forgot, Jack. So sorry.  Us ... forgot about us.“

“Shh, it's okay.  You remember now.”

“Help me, Jack.  Take me home.”

“I will, Danny.  We'll go home, and we'll make this nightmare go away.”

Sam hadn't been able to hear much, just a few scattered words -- scared, together, us, home -- but it wasn't the words that told her their secret, it was the touching, the way her two friends were holding on to each other, the way their faces were snuggled together.

The blonde Captain had suspected there was more to her friend's relationship than friendship since they had been sent to the prison world of Hadante.  She had seen little things there that made her wonder, and couldn't get over the way the usually very private Daniel had allowed Jack into his personal space.  Now, with what she had just witnessed, every fiber of her being told her that her suspicions were correct.

~I knew it; just didn't quite want to believe it.  Wow, it's real.  It's so real.~

Sam heard a noise and looked to her right.  She saw one of the Marines moving forward.

“That's okay, guys.  Everything is under control.”

“Sam!” Janet called out.  “Where's Daniel?”

“He's with the colonel.”

“In there?” Janet started to move towards the storeroom, but Sam grabbed her arm.

“Give them a minute, Janet.  I think what Daniel needs right now is ... just a minute or two with ... his best friend.”

Janet looked at the captain quizzically.

“Sam ...”

“Just one minute, okay?”

Hesitantly, Janet relented, but continued to stare at the open door.  Sam nodded her thanks, and after a few more seconds, moved back to the entrance of the storeroom.

“Sir, Janet's outside.”

“Thanks, Carter.  Give us a minute.”

Sam backed away.

“Danny, we need to go back to the infirmary.”

“Hoooome,” Daniel cried.  “Don't let them see me.  Cold.  Please ... home.”

“I'll take you home, but the Doc needs to check you out first.”  **I love you.**

“Love you,” Daniel said, unaware he'd spoken it aloud.

Jack didn't mind.  He didn't care about 'Don't Ask, Don't Tell' at the moment.  Gently, he helped his lover up.  Tears streaming down Daniel's face, he gazed into Jack's eyes.  The older man brushed back the straggly clumps of Daniel's sweaty hair and smiled.  Then he put one arm around his lover's waist to support him, and with his other hand, he held Daniel's.  They'd walk out together, and if anyone wanted to make assumptions, they could.

Slowly, they exited the storeroom.  Daniel started to panic when he saw the Marines and the medical team outside, instinctively moving back towards the storeroom, but Jack squeezed him close.

**Look at me, Danny.  It's just us.  You and me.  I love you.**

Daniel swallowed and leaned his head against Jack's shoulder.  He didn't care much about the real world at the moment, and even if he did, his mind felt too soggy and full of muck that was hampering his thinking to do anything about it.

“Here we go.  Lay down,” Jack said as he helped his partner onto the gurney the medical team had brought.

“Home, Jack.  Please.”

“We'll go home soon.  I promise.”

“Okay, Colonel, let me in there.”

Suddenly, Daniel remembered shoving Janet out of his way.

“Gawd.  Janet, I'm sorry ...”

“Quiet down, Doctor Jackson.  It wasn't you; it was the effects of the sarcophagus.  Now, relax, and let me examine you.”
//End of Flashback//

~Gawd.  I hurt them all.~

“Danny, rest.  I can hear you.”

“I should have fought harder.”

“You are fighting, Love.  I'm proud of you.”

“Shyla.  She wanted me.  I forgot about you, Jack.  How could I do that?”

“Not you, Love,” Jack stroked his lover's head and back.  “It was that Goa'uld chamber of horrors, except,” Jack sighed, “it did save your life.”

Daniel leaped up and looked at Jack with rage in his eyes.

“YOU DON'T WANT ME!  YOU WANTED ME TO STAY.”

“Daniel,” Jack got off the bed and walked slowly towards his soulmate, “you know that's not true.”

“IT IS TRUE.  I'M NOTHING!  INSIGNIFICANT!  YOU PUT ME IN THAT THING!”

“Danny, I didn't even know they had one of those things.  I didn't know that until you told us later.  I just hoped they had a doctor to help you, but Danny, if that was the only way to save your life, then I would have done it anyway.  I had to; I'd do anything to safe your life.”

“To save me?  SAVE ME?  You call THIS saving me?”

“We're going to get through it.”

“I DON'T NEED YOU!”

Daniel ran and struggled to get by Jack.  He bumped into the side of the dresser and knocked several things off.  Jack grabbed on to the back of Daniel's shirt and then managed to pull Daniel back to him.  Jack's front was a