Please Don't Die
Category: Slash, H/C of the mental kind, Missing Scene/Epilogue, Romance, Established Relationship
Pairing: Jack/Daniel ... and it's all J/D
Season: 4 - during and after Double Jeopardy
Spoilers: Double Jeopardy
Written: November 2-3,5,8, 2003 Revised: January 24, February 1, May 31, September 9-10,13, 17-18, 2005
Summary: Daniel dies ... again, and Jack goes on a bender as he mourns!
Disclaimer: Usual disclaimers -- not mine, wish they were, especially Daniel, and Jack, too, but they aren't. A gal can dream though!
1) Silent, unspoken thoughts by various characters are indicated with ~ in front and behind them, such as ~Where am I?~
2) Thanks to my betas who always make my fics better: Suzanna, Drdjlover, Starshadow, Claudia, QuinGem, Tove, Linda!
Please Don't Die
Feeling lost, frightened, and anxious, Jack sat on the short bench in
the locker room, his body hunched forward, head bowed, and hands
clasped tightly together. Needing a bit more time to get himself
together, Jack was grateful Teal'c had already left for the control
room, leaving him alone in the stillness of the bland room. It
was a room full of memories -- jokes and banter, glances of
uncertainty, seduction, and concern, moments of stolen touches and
kisses. All of these recollections echoed through Jack's mind.
Having already changed into his green BDUs, Jack stared across the room's expanse, at the locker that he knew held both a blue and a brown SGC uniform as well as a blue robe. He stared at the name on the locker door -- Daniel Jackson.
~Daniel Jackson. Archaeologist. Anthropologist. Linguist. Peaceful Explorer. Best Friend. Confidante. Lover. My Love. My Life. My Angel.~
His head still bowed, Jack looked sightlessly at the cold floor as his mind replayed recent events. As far as Jack was concerned, the day had begun badly anyway simply because Daniel was off-world on a negotiating mission with SG-9. Things had gone downhill from there, beginning with the arrival of Harlan, the synthetic life form from Altair.
The flamboyant Harlan was still extraordinarily annoying to Jack, and his news that the duplicate SG-1 team he'd created a few years earlier was missing made Jack's day continue its downward spiral. Just when Jack was sure the day couldn't get worse, the SGC had managed to make contact with Jack's double on the planet Juna. Jack closed his eyes as he recalled the words he'd heard a few minutes earlier.
“Our Daniel is dead.”
Those were the words that synthetic Jack had spoken through the MALP to General Hammond.
~Our Daniel is dead,~ Jack spoke in the silence of his mind.
~Daniel is dead.~
~Daniel is dead.~
~Daniel is dead.~
~Daniel is dead.~
~No!~ Jack raised his hands to the back of his neck and rubbed hard, trying to alleviate the pain he was feeling. He grimaced from the horrid words that wouldn't leave him. With each replay, his heartbeat slowed. ~Daniel is dead.~
“Sir? Colonel O'Neill, are you all right?” Sam called out in concern.
Jack nodded as he lowered his hands and then put on his boots in silence.
Sam was waiting for Jack to finish using the locker room so she could prepare for their upcoming mission as well. SG-1 would be heading for Juna, otherwise known as P2X 729, where they would join their doubles to fight Heru'ur. The human SG-1 team had already been to the planet some months earlier, and when the synthetic copies had arrived, they received a chilling reception from the inhabitants.
The Goa'uld, specifically Cronus, had overrun the planet. In the aftermath of the duplicate SG-1's arrival, Synthetic Daniel had been decapitated and both Synthetic Sam and Synthetic Teal'c had been captured. Only Synthetic Jack had managed to evade the Goa'uld and would be in a position to join forces with the real SG-1 to try and free the planet.
~He's taking this so hard, but Daniel is okay.~ Sam sighed, wondering whether or not she should say anything more. She fidgeted slightly as she waited in the doorway, trying not to stare at her sorrowful CO. Finally, she decided she had to speak up. “Daniel is fine, Colonel. I mean, our Daniel is fine,” the major assured.
Jack looked up and nodded, but the emptiness of his eyes concerned Sam. There was also an eeriness about her CO's silent agreement.
~He doesn't believe Daniel is okay.~ Sam nervously bobbed up and down on the heels of her feet, knowing Jack was thinking about the real Daniel. ~I feel so helpless. Darn, I wish SG-9 would get done early. Nothing is going to help the colonel except to hear Daniel's voice.~
As Jack stood and grabbed his equipment, he said softly, “I missed his check-in this morning. Traffic accident caused a delay. Did you talk to him?”
“No, Sir,” Sam sighed regretfully. “I was working on the mineral project.”
Jack didn't react, except to silently walk out of the locker room. It was time to battle the Goa'uld once again.
In human terms, the mission had been a success. Teal'c, with the help of his double, had finally managed to avenge his father's death by killing Cronus. The citizens of Juna were promised more help from the Tau'ri to prevent the return of any Goa'uld. However, the cost in terms of the synthetic copies of SG-1 had been high. Each had died in the battle, heroically sacrificing themselves for their human counterparts.
Harlan had been inconsolable, reluctantly returning to Altair, unsure of what would become of him or his planet.
The debriefing had gone smoothly, after which Teal'c went to his quarters, Sam to continue working on her current project, and Jack to the nightmare of paperwork. After hours of his tedious war with his bulging 'in' bin, Jack had left his office and now stood quietly in a corner of the control room. It was 2200 hours, and Cheyenne Mountain was quiet.
“Colonel, I didn't know you were still here,” Sam said upon entering the control room.
“Didn't I order you to get a life, Major?”
Jack's voice lacked its usual spark. His question had been spoken in a monotone, and Sam couldn't help but notice the emptiness in her CO's brown eyes.
“Yes, Sir, but the mission to Juna put me behind schedule,” the blonde admitted. A bit hesitantly, Sam went to the computer where she had planned to work for a while. She could see Jack out of the corner of her eye, just standing still, staring at the motionless Stargate. “Sir, the next check-in isn't scheduled until tomorrow morning at 0800. You should go home ... Sir.”
Without acknowledging her, Jack turned and left, causing Sam's worry to compound. Knowing there was nothing she could do to help, Sam set about to continue her work.
It was midnight before the Air Force major finished her work. Just when she was packing up her equipment, an incoming signal was received.
~Daniel~ Sam smiled slightly as she realized the communication was from SG-9, the team Daniel was with temporarily. ~I hope you're coming home soon.~
Sam listened as the transmission connected, and when she heard Daniel's voice, she motioned away the technician on duty and took the 'call' herself.
“Hey, Sam, we need a few things ...”
Daniel relayed the needs of the team which Sam jotted down for handling, and then at the end, he added, “Check with the general. We'd like to stay an extra day.”
“An extra day?” Sam asked, her voice hitching slightly.
“Yes, uh, I think it could be valuable, help build the trust,” Daniel answered.
“Oh,” Sam said with a hesitant breath.
“Sam, is anything wrong?” the archaeologist inquired after his friend's unenthusiastic response.
“Daniel,” Sam paused, glancing over her shoulder at the two technicians working in the room. She knew they would hear anything and everything she said during her conversation. ~Okay, Sam, old girl, use your brain. How can you say this?~ She coughed as a rouse as she determined the code she'd use to relay her message. “Silver Fox is in need of some attention. Nothing's ... dented or anything, but ... sooner might be better than later, if you know what I mean.”
There was a slight pause before Daniel replied, “Thanks, Sam.”
As soon as the transmission ended, one of the technicians on duty in the control room asked, “Silver Fox, Major?”
“His car,” Sam quickly responded. “He calls it the Silver Fox; very sleek, sporty.”
“Doctor Jackson has a sports car?” the tech asked in total surprise. ~He sure doesn't seem like the type. Maybe a Model T or something like a VW bug from the sixties.~
“Oh, yeah. It really moves,” Sam commented, recalling the times she'd driven the expensive vehicle.
“And it ... needs attention?”
“Hmm-mmm. Cars and kids, you know, always in need of something,” Sam said, smiling as she left the area.
Sam had finally gotten to sleep. When she looked at the clock, it was 0145 hours. She was looking forward to a nice, long, quiet rest, and with any luck, a dream about her own personal Major Matt Mason who would sweep her off her feet and go soaring into the universe with her, living happily ever after.
And then ...
RING ... RING ... RING ... RING ... RING ... RING ...
“H'lo?” a groggy voice managed to say.
“I'm sorry, Sam, but I need to know what's going on,” Daniel requested apologetically.
“Daniel, where are you?” Sam said as she sat up slightly.
“In the Silver Fox and headed home,” the archaeologist answered as he stopped at a stoplight.
“How'd you? No, don't tell me. I don't want to know,” Sam chuckled lightly.
“Sam ...” Daniel said, his tone turning her name into a question.
“Daniel, you, uh, well, you died again,” the blonde explained.
“Excuse me?” Daniel asked, his voice almost a lilt at what he'd heard.
“How could I forget?” Daniel asked, his eyes widening at the remembrance of meeting his duplicate on Altair.
“Well, our doubles ... they've died, all of them, on a ... mission, kind of, but yours was first. The colonel ... he ... well, he's taken it pretty hard. He missed that last check-in with SG-9 before the mission, and ... <yawn> ... sorry.”
“I'm sorry I woke you, Sam,” Daniel apologized. “Go back to sleep.”
“Glad you're back, Daniel,” Sam replied quietly.
“You knew I'd come back as soon as I could,” Daniel correctly surmised.
Smiling, Sam said, “Yeah, I thought you might.”
“There's nothing more important to me than ... Silver Fox. Sorry, I know you're still uncomfortable talking about it, but ... thanks, Sam. Goodnight.”
“Night, Daniel,” Sam said. She yawned as she put the phone down on nightstand. ~A Major Matt Mason doll ... mmmm ... wonder if they make Doctor Daniel Jackson dolls. I'd like one and ...~ Sam sat up and shook her head. “Samantha, don't go there. Holy Hannah!” As she lay back down, she said silently, ~At least I didn't think about a Colonel Jack doll. Ewww. We'd kill each other.~
With a shiver, Sam rolled over and pulled the covers over her head, hoping to quickly go to sleep and avoid scary thoughts.
The lights were out at the house Jack and Daniel shared. Daniel hoped that meant Jack had found some peace and had gone to bed. He entered the house quietly, heading for the stairs when he stopped suddenly. He could barely make out his lover sitting completely in the dark, holding something in his hand. Daniel moved to turn on a light.
Jack raised his hand to shield his eyes, blinked as he saw Daniel, and then took a swig of beer.
“Welcome home, Dannyboy,” Jack spoke with a humorless laugh.
Daniel put his keys in his pocket and surveyed the area, noticing several empty bottles on the floor around the chair.
“Jack,” Daniel said softly as he walked to his lover and kneeled down in front of him. “I love you, Jack,” he added, taking Jack's left hand and kissing it.
“You died ... again,” Jack whispered. “That's not good, Danny. Dying is not good.”
“I know,” Daniel replied tenderly, his hands warming his soulmate's. “Sam told me about our doubles and what happened on the planet, but, uh, I'm home now, Babe.” Daniel stood up, saying, “Let's go to bed.”
“Your head went rolling on the floor, sparking all over the place; that's what he said. Just rolling ... rolling ... rolling ... move 'em up, head 'em out, Rawhide.”
“Jack?” Daniel asked quizzically. ~He's not making any sense.~
“Just a song,” Jack said and then took another drink with his free hand.
“Jack, that's enough,” Daniel chastised. Daniel reached for the bottle, but Jack pushed him back, standing up quickly. The older man wobbled a moment before regaining his bearings. “Jack,” Daniel pleaded as he reached out and took his lover's hand again.
“You died, Danny! Gawd, you died again. I can't live through that anymore,” Jack said angrily. Softening, he continued, “Charlie ... I died when he did, and then you brought me back to life. And you died ... and died ... and died ... and now you've died again. Please don't die anymore, Danny.”
Daniel took Jack into his arms and held him tightly. Jack's chin was nestled into Daniel's shoulder, his hands hanging loosely behind Daniel's back.
“The synthetic ... me said your body was just laying there ... headless. No movement ... just ... there,” Jack cried into Daniel's embrace, as the beer bottle he had been holding dropped to the ground, the liquid draining onto the carpet.
“I'm here, Love. Everything's going to be okay,” Daniel promised his life partner.
“When are you coming home, Danny?” Jack asked, still not believing Daniel was actually holding him. ~I need you, Angel.~
“I'm home now,” Daniel tried to reassure his soulmate, his hands pressing Jack to him as he held him lovingly.
Jack wasn't convinced, his heart aching at a loss that hadn't happened.
“I need you, Danny. Don't die. Come home to me,” Jack begged in a tone of voice Daniel had never heard before.
Daniel felt his heart break at his lover's despair. He knew that, while the beers were causing part of the agony Jack was feeling, one of Jack's biggest fears was losing Daniel again. They didn't talk about all the 'deaths' much, but sometimes Daniel would see Jack watching him, just watching, and it was more than the playful 'watching your six' game they often engaged in. It was almost a phobia, a panicked fear that if he turned around Daniel might disappear forever.
“Come on, Jack. Let's go upstairs,” the younger man gently coaxed.
Daniel helped his lover to their bedroom. He took off Jack's clothes and started to reach for his soulmate's pajamas.
~No. He needs reassurance,~ Daniel thought, knowing that nothing was more reassuring than the two lovers together, being as one, skin to skin. Thus, he made sure Jack got safely into bed and then undressed himself before getting into his side of the bed. Jack had uncharacteristically laid on his right side, facing the nightstand. ~He doesn't believe I'm here, but I am, and I will keep you safe. I love you so much.~
Daniel spooned up next to Jack, kissing the top of his back. Protectively, he placed his arm around the older man. Jack often did this for Daniel, but it was rare that Daniel was able to comfort his soulmate in this way.
“I'm here, Babe,” Daniel soothed. “It feels so good to be next to you.”
“Don't die anymore,” Jack begged.
“Sleep, Jack,” Daniel urged and then placed several soft kisses on Jack's neck and shoulders.
After an hour or so of holding Jack but not being able to sleep, Daniel got up and retrieved his laptop. He tapped into the SGC computer, using Jack's sign on, and read Jack's mission report.
“Poor Harlan,” Daniel sighed, wondering what would become of their synthetic friend.
Daniel didn't have much time to ponder Harlan's fate, however, as Jack began to thrash about, moaning and uttering broken words and partial sentences. Daniel realized immediately it was a nightmare. Both he and Jack suffered hauntings from their pasts that manifested themselves in the form of bad dreams, and thus, this nightmare had not been unexpected. Quickly, he moved the laptop off the bed and was about to try and calm his lover when the nightmare jumped in intensity.
“NO! DANIEL! DON'T DIE! DANNNIELLLLLLLL!” Jack shouted vehemently.
“Jack.” Daniel carefully tried to tend to his Love without being slugged, something the younger man always had to watch for because of Jack's Special Forces training. “Jack, it's okay,” he spoke softly. “Wake up, Love. I'm right here,” Daniel said, running his hands along his lover's back, arms, and hair, and talking as soothingly as possible.
“Danny,” Jack panted as he woke from his nightmare, breathing hard and sweating.
“Right here,” Daniel spoke in a near-hush, scooping Jack into him, his head leaning against Daniel's shoulder. Daniel held on securely. It wasn't often that Jack's nightmares actually caused him to shake, but Daniel felt his lover trembling as a result of this one. “I'm alive, Jack. I'm here. We're both safe. Love you so much,” Daniel spoke as he placed a kiss on the head of his lover.
“Gawd, Danny. Need you,” Jack desperately responded.
“You have me, all of me, and I'm not going anywhere. I'm staying right here, Love. Shh, it's okay; it's okay.” Daniel intoned quietly as he scooted down. “Let's go to sleep; everything's all right.”
~I have to know he's alive.~ Jack surprised his lover by shifting, placing his head over Daniel's heart, and then commenting, “So strong.”
“What?” Daniel asked.
“Your heartbeat,” Jack answered. “I need to hear it. Don't let it stop.” ~I understand now why he likes it; comforting; need to hear it. My Danny. No more dying.~
Daniel knew what Jack was feeling because that's why he loved sleeping on his 'Jack Pillow'. Hearing Jack's steady heartbeat provided the younger man with a feeling of safety and comfort. He realized that is what Jack needed tonight -- to know that their nation of two was safe and thriving. With a loving smile, Daniel ran his hands along Jack's hair and placed them against his forehead gently.
“Sleep, Jack. I love you.”
“Danny?” Jack startled himself awake, sensing that he was alone in his bed and wondering if he had dreamed Daniel's return or had hallucinated from being drunk. “DANIEL!”
The yell was panicked and fearful.
“Whoa, Babe ... right here,” the now-dressed Daniel responded as he entered the bedroom with a calming smile, holding a tray with some orange juice, fruit, toast, and a small bowl of Froot Loops.
“I thought ...”
“Jack, I'm sorry.” Daniel placed the tray on the bed and leaned over for a quick kiss. “I figured you'd wake up soon, and I wanted you to have something to eat. Jack, you're shaking.”
“I'm cold,” a trembling Jack spoke, his hands trying to warm his body. “Danny.”
“It's okay,” Daniel soothed. Concerned that Jack might be getting a cold, Daniel got up and retrieved his lover's pajamas, intending to pamper him in bed that day. “Here, Babe.”
“What a nightmare. You aren't supposed to be here,” Jack stated in surprise as he quickly scooted on the pajamas. ~Oh, boy; too many beers.~
“Where should I be?” Daniel quizzed as he buttoned Jack's top for him. ~He doesn't feel cold, but he's still shaking.~
“On P-something-or-another. How?” the older man inquired.
~Bet the hangover is killing him.~ Daniel ran his left hand through Jack's silver-gray hair and answered, “When I checked in last night, Sam told me my Silver Fox needed me, so I came home. It's that simple.”
“You left P-whatever-it-is for me?” Jack asked, a bit taken aback. ~You really left your playground for me?~
~Gawd, won't he ever learn that he means more to me than anything?~ Daniel smiled and replied, “I'd leave anywhere for you, My Love. You know that, or you should know that.”
“I love you, Angel.”
“Love you, too.” Daniel kissed the man who was his heart and then with a mock sternness said, “Now, eat!” moving the tray atop Jack's lap.
“Yes, General,” Jack teased though with an uneasiness still in his voice. ~He's beautiful, and he's mine. I need him. Don't die, Danny.~
Daniel started to move off the bed, but as he did, Jack reached for him and pleaded, “Please stay, Angel.”
Seeing the younger man smile and motion for him to eat, Jack began his meal.
“Better?” Daniel asked after Jack had eaten a few bites of fruit and cereal.
“I don't know. Not shaking as much; still cold,” Jack answered, needing the security of his lover by his side.
“I'll warm you up after breakfast,” Daniel promised with lust in his eyes and heart.
“You're alive?” Jack asked, still not convinced he was awake.
“Babe, I'm going to prove to you just how alive I am very soon,” Daniel promised. “Eat!”
“Don't you know it!” Daniel teased as he gazed upon his worried soulmate.
“What's in this stuff,” Jack asked moments later after he drank some of the orange juice Daniel had prepared for him.
“You don't want to know, but it'll help with your hangover,” Daniel coyly answered.
Jack nibbled at his food, but none of the items were what he really needed. Without warning, he moved the tray to Daniel's side of the bed, not caring if the items soiled the area. He leaned up and kissed his heart, each of them moaning from the kiss, a kiss that ignited them both.
“Jack,” Daniel gasped the moment he finally was able to breathe again. “I love you.”
Jack pulled Daniel to him and settled back into a prone position, Daniel atop him, their hands roaming each other's body.
“Love you, Danny,” Jack gasped. “Please don't ever die again.”
As they kissed, their hunger soared. They were noisy as they kissed and fondled. Daniel was so lost in the moment that he was totally surprised when Jack flipped them over.
“How'd you do that?” the younger man asked in amazement as he found himself on the bottom and Jack devouring his mouth from atop him. ~It's hard to talk when he's kissing me like that. Oh forget it. Who needs talking?~
“Motivation,” Jack answered, ravishing Daniel some more, the Froot Loops having scattered all over the bed from the movement of the lover's bodies.
Their kisses were powerful. Jack couldn't seem to stop kissing his lover, their tongues flicking about as if on fire. Their lips sucked and their teeth nipped, while sighs and moans escaped from their throats.
“Love you,” Jack rasped again, in between his sucking of Daniel's tongue. ~Crap. Why'd I put on these pj's anyway?~
With his left hand, Jack pulled out Daniel's tucked in shirt, running his hand along his lover's skin, pressing against it, needing the touch desperately ... and still, he never stopped the kisses.
Daniel worked to take off Jack's pajama top, managing to get the top unbuttoned and off Jack's right arm, but he had a slight problem with Jack's left arm which was occupied ... unbuttoning and unzipping Daniel's jeans, and then stroking his lover's hard length. Daniel didn't really want to interfere with that so he let the flannel fabric drop, hanging to their side.
Their mouths were clinging to each others, their lips swelling from the constant contact. Their bodies were beginning to rock into each other, seeking more intimate contact.
Daniel's hands caressed Jack's lower back, and then swiftly pulled down the pajama bottoms as far as he could from where he laid. Jack arched a little to allow them to scoot down, and still, they kissed, their tongues dancing wildly, each exploring every crevice of the other's mouth.
Jack's hand stroked Daniel's shaft quickly and powerfully. Daniel was moaning louder, the pressing touches of his lover's hand sending tingles and shivers through his willing body.
Jack moved a little and Daniel lifted himself just a bit to allow Jack to lower Daniel's jeans and boxers down to his knees, which was as far as they could go without separating their lips, something neither seemed prepared to do at the moment.
Jack's hand stroked Daniel up and down, the tips of his fingers squeezing occasionally. He increased the speed, working his lover's shaft as he continued the kisses.
“Jack ... geez ... love you!”
Daniel wasn't sure how he managed to say all that with Jack's tongue still in his mouth, but somehow he had. His hands were moving smoothly along Jack's lower back and buttocks, pinching lightly now and then, squeezing, pushing Jack into him.
At the same time, Daniel was lost in the feel of Jack, the power of their kisses unlike anything they'd ever experienced before.
Jack continued to massage his lover's length, faster, firmer, taking Daniel to the point of no return.
“Gawd,” Daniel panted into Jack's mouth. His eyes closed as his muscles tensed. Finally, an incredible relief swelled within him as Daniel came into Jack's left hand. ~Oh, Jack. My Jack!~
“Love you, Angel,” Jack breathed softly, moving his body even closer, never parting their mouths.
“Want you ... so much,” Jack whispered, a desperation to his voice, in between kisses.
The older man nibbled on Daniel's upper lip and Daniel's head rose slightly as if by doing so he could reach deeper into Jack's mouth, his tongue gliding along Jack's teeth, still moaning.
Jack reached under his pillow, the one Daniel's head was against, and pulled out the lube. Without hesitating, he put an ample amount on his fingers and, wasting not time, quickly prepared his lover.
Jack had shifted again out of necessity, but he found he needed contact with Daniel's lips, so he moved up for more kisses, and they both clung together, scrunching their bodies into each other. They made themselves into a tight ball, their bodies curving and arching to whatever extent was necessary to give them the contact they so urgently desired.
Jack entered Daniel, holding still as they kissed. They had never quite done it this way before. It was a bit of a challenge, but they twisted their bodies until they could do what they wanted to.
Slowly and evenly, Jack moved back and forward inside his love, making gentle contact with Daniel's most sensitive areas.
The moans increased with their labored breaths.
“Need you ... never ... never leave,” Jack begged.
“Love you, Jack ... not ... going ... anywhere,” Daniel responded in between the kisses of their lovemaking, his length hardened again from the intensity of their union and his love and need for Jack.
“Hmm ... geez.”
Jack picked up the pace; Daniel's legs mingled in with Jack's body, clinging to him as they jammed their bodies together in a fusion that could look like a modern work of art.
“Please ... don't ... don't ... die,” Jack begged, his hammering against Daniel's prostate exploding inside the younger man, the sparks filling him with pleasure as he continued on. More kisses, possessive and tender, were exchanged, their tongues desperate to battle just as Jack's length was doing inside Daniel. Jack whispered, “Mine ... all mine.”
“Yes ... yours,” Daniel panted. “Only yours ... love you ... just you.” ~No one does ... does ... oh, Jack ... only you make me feel like this ... Jaaa...~ “JACK!”
“Don't die,” Jack sobbed.
The sweat rolled off Jack's brow, mixing in with the tears that fell onto the younger man. He kissed Daniel again, combining their lips touching with a powerful lunge inside the younger man.
“Won't ... love you ... life ... you're mine,” Daniel replied in a sob similar to Jack's. He was drifting in the overwhelming emotions of lust, despair, and happiness, one hand working his shaft as he drifted with Jack inside him. The feelings seemed to conflict, but they were powerful. ~Just Jack.~ “YESSS!” he screamed as Jack's length pounded against his prostate in just the right spot to grant Daniel a wondrous sensation he couldn't describe.
“Mine!” Jack claimed.
“Yes ... yours,” Daniel willingly agreed.
Their panting and labored breathing threatened to prevent both from being able to speak, and yet, their tongues still licked, tasted, and nibbled on each other. There were numerous brief unions of their mouths, their lips almost bruised from the constant intense contact.
“Live ... geez, Danny, live. Please don't die,” Jack begged again. He was at the end, about to be drained of all the trauma of the last two days and the pleasure of the last half-hour with his lover. ~Can't ... can't live without you.~
“Won't ... with you ... forever,” Daniel gasped as he came again in his hand, just as Jack exploded with his own completion.
“Love you,” Jack shouted as he gave a final hard thrust into Daniel, his orgasm causing him to collapse down onto Daniel's chest.
The lovers were trembling and Jack convulsing from the harmonies of their bodies. Daniel had tears rolling down his face, as did Jack. He sniffled as he placed his arms around Jack, making soft strokes of love on his back, his hands reaching up to stroke Jack's soaked hair.
“I love you, Jack. You're my life. Not going anywhere without you ... not ever,” Daniel said with a cracked voice. He was fighting to be lucid, though he wanted to give in to his body and be consumed by the euphoria of their aftermath. ~Can't. Jack needs me. Have ... have to be in ... in control.~
“Heartbeat ... so strong, Danny,” Jack gasped as his ear listened to the rapid thumping of the organ. ~Thump ... thump ... yes!~
“For you, My Love ... because of you and for you ... always,” Daniel said.
“Love you so friggin' much, Daniel.”
For the next hour, they held each other, not letting go, even for a second. Neither moved, Jack listening to the sound of his lover's heart, and Daniel doing nothing but running his finger's through Jack's hair. It wasn't silent, though; the lovers' hearts speaking continuous words of love to each other.
Finally, Jack let out a small sniffle and looked up at Daniel. He moved his hand to Daniel's cheek and smiled.
“Do you have any idea?” Jack asked a bit cryptically.
Daniel nodded, answering, “A little. Do you?”
The tears were still falling as they talked about the enormity of their love, and Jack decided it was his turn to do some comforting. The breakfast tray was a lost cause, as were their comforter and sheets, so Jack just tossed what wasn't already off the bed, off, moved over on his back, and pulled Daniel up to him, allowing the younger man to nestle in his accustomed place on Jack's body.
As he settled in, Daniel sighed, prompting Jack to comment, “I thought you might like that.”
“Hmm,” Daniel happily sighed. “My Jack pillow. It's the bestest ever invented.”
“I got scared, Danny,” Jack admitted. “I don't know why.”
“It's okay,” Daniel assured.
“I missed the check-in,” the older man sighed. “I hadn't heard your voice, and then Harlan showed. Then ...” Jack paused, the nightmare returning for a moment until he got control. “That thing that looked like me told me you were dead. I couldn't get his words, spoken in my voice, saying 'our Daniel is dead' out of my mind. It was like a blasted record that was stuck, over and over again playing those words -- 'Our Daniel is dead'.”
“Jack, we're here, together; it's okay,” Daniel said calmly.
Jack continued, his eyes seeing what wasn't there, “And then I saw it; gawd, Danny, it was just sitting there in a corner ... your head ... sitting there.”
“It wasn't me, Love,” Daniel said about the decapitated head.
“But it was. Crap, Danny. They were us. They died like we would have. They were brave, and they sacrificed themselves for us and for the people of that planet. They were real. I can't deny that anymore.”
“Jack?” Daniel asked.
“I love you.”
“I love you, too, Danny.”
“Forever and always, together ... you and I,” Daniel said as his fingers toyed with Jack's chest hairs.
“Yeah, forever, we're unbeatable together,” Jack agreed.
“What's going to happen to Harlan?” Daniel asked, concerned for the well-intentioned lifeform.
“I don't know. He loved ... us,” Jack sadly chuckled.
“He needs help, Jack,” Daniel replied, his tone telling Jack that he wanted to help.
“No more doubles, Danny. I can't watch you die again, not even as a clone,” Jack confessed. ~No more dying.~
“They weren't clones; they were synthetic recreations of us,” Daniel explained.
“I don't care what they were,” Jack responded a bit sharply. “I just don't want that to happen again.”
“Don't worry, Babe. Not going without you. You're my comfy pillow, remember?” Daniel said.
“Yeah; we can't have you without your pillow,” Jack teased as he took in the scent of the man he loved and squeezed him securely.
“My Jack pillow -- keeps me warm, safe and comfy,” Daniel said contentedly.
“I try,” Jack whispered, completely serious.
Daniel moved, lifting his head up to look into Jack's chocolate brown eyes. He took his right hand and traced his lover's face, studying each feature carefully for a moment. Then he placed a short, tender kiss on Jack's lips.
“You do, Jack. Every single day your eyes warm me with love, your arms hold me with strength, and your heart comforts me with life.”
Daniel's fingers ran across Jack's lips, Jack kissing the slender digits as they moved gently across.
“Thank you for coming back early, Danny. How'd you explain that anyway?” a curious Jack asked.
“I'm a genius, Love,” Daniel chuckled. “I thought of something.”
“I know that ... but what exactly did you think of?”
Daniel smiled and answered, “I told Colonel Hendricks about that time you loaned me out to SG-11, and I got sick and how you had Major Michaelson transferred to Elmendorf; and then I told him about that time with SG-8 when that gregirk creature broke my ribs and how you broke the leader of SG-8's ribs; and then I told him about that time ...”
“Daniel, I never had Michaelson transferred. He retired after that mission, and the thing with Manotti was an accident during training.”
Daniel grinned, replying, “I know that, Babe, but Hendricks doesn't.”
“My genius,” Jack retorted pridefully. ~He did that for me. My Danny.~
“The mission was over, Jack. Everything had gone off perfectly, ahead of schedule even. I wasn't needed there, but I was needed here, so ... I came home.”
Jack's hand raised to caress Daniel's cheek, “You're always needed, Angel. Thank you.”
“Everything, Love; everything,” Jack answered, a peaceful feeling flowing inside of him.
Daniel rested his head against Jack's chest again. Their tears had dried, and Jack was better. He placed a kiss upon Jack's chest and then nuzzled his head against his lover. Jack's right hand slid down and took hold of Daniel's left hand. He squeezed it while still caressing the skin with his thumb.
“Danny, if you want, I'll talk to Hammond and see if we can contact Harlan; maybe we can figure something out, but we're not going back there. I don't trust him.”
~He's not so tough.~ Daniel smiled and replied, “Thank you, Jack. I don't want him to be alone. No one should be alone.”
A few minutes passed as they continued to enjoy the feel of each other and the life flowing through their bodies.
“You're such an ingrate!” Daniel said in a mock-brisk tone.
“Huh?” the clueless colonel answered.
“I went to all that trouble to get up early, make you breakfast in bed, and you barely touched it ... and now it's,” Daniel laughed, “all over the floor.”
“Oops,” Jack chuckled. “I'm sorry. I was more hungry for you,” Jack answered, placing a kiss atop Daniel's head.
“I ... saw, uh, felt that,” a blushing Daniel noted.
“You can try again. I'll stay here and wait,” Jack teased, though he didn't ease his hold on his lover. ~Don't want to let you go, Danny.~
“I don't think so -- too sticky,” Daniel observed. ~Actually, I just don't want to move; like it here.~
“I love you sticky; sweaty, too,” Jack chuckled.
“Gawd, at least I can't get pregnant. If you had your way, I'd be barefoot and in the kitchen, having babies,” Daniel laughed loudly.
“What an image!” Jack exclaimed.
“Awful. Geez ... nightmare,” Daniel agreed, trying to shove the image from his mind.
“No, it's a beautiful picture,” Jack said seriously.
“You've lost your mind,” the younger man spoke emphatically. “I knew it would happen eventually.”
Jack laughed, but he smiled as he thought silently about his love for his soulmate. His need and desire for Daniel was stronger than anything he had ever felt before. On some level, he had to admit Daniel was right. If there could ever be a way ...
~No, can't go there. Charlie's death is a memory etched on my mind. I can't get it out. Still, if I ever did ...~
Jack kissed his soulmate. He couldn't continue his thought, but while Charlie's death was too engraved in his mind, and he was sure he'd never get beyond that, Jack also knew that if he ever did, it would be Daniel who would get him there.
“Jack, you're too quiet. What are you thinking about?” Daniel inquired.
“You, barefoot and pregnant, bringing me my dinner and my slippers,” Jack chirped.
“Not on your life, Colonel,” Daniel replied definitively.
“PMS?” Jack teased.
“Jack, you are so dead!” Daniel threatened.
Daniel moved to swat his lover lightly, only Jack darted away evasively, trying to get up out of the bed, but then Daniel grabbed him by the waist and pulled him back down.
Both laughed wildly as they kissed the rest of the day away. Eventually, they ate, but mostly, they feasted on each other. Every kiss, touch, and sound helped them to smile, laugh, and feel both safe and warm inside. It was a day in which they reassured themselves that Jack and Daniel are forever, their love strong and growing with each passing day!
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