Singing Soprano

Author:  Orrymain and special guest co-author, Sara!
Category:  Slash, Drama, Humor, Romance, Missing Scene/Epilogue, Established Relationship
Pairing:  Jack/Daniel ... and it's all J/D
Rating:  PG-13
Season:  3 - August 5-7, 1999
Spoilers:  Seth
Size:  34kb, short story
Written:  March 27-28,30, April 1,3-4,11-12, 2007
Summary:  Jack hams it up after Seth is killed, while Daniel reflects on the eerie aspect of the events.
Disclaimer:  Usual disclaimers -- not mine, wish they were, especially Daniel, and Jack, too, but they aren't.  A gal can dream though!
Notes:  
1) Sometimes, Jack and Daniel speak almost telepathically.  Their “silent” words to each other are indicated by asterisks instead of quotes, such as **Jack, we can't.**
2) Silent, unspoken thoughts by various characters are indicated with ~ in front and behind them, such as ~Where am I?~
3) Thanks to my betas who always make my fics better:  Claudia, Melissa, Jodi, Linda, Pam!

Singing Soprano
by Orrymain and Sara

“Hi-ho, hi-ho, it's home from work we go.  No eunuchs -- hey, lived through the day; hi-ho, hi-ho, hi-ho hi-ho hi-ho. hi-ho, hi-ho, we're safe and home -- no need to moan, and Seth was made to pay,” Jack sang in falsetto, his off key, high-pitched tone causing Daniel's eyes to squint in sympathy with his ears.

“Jack!” Daniel cried out, turning quickly to face his lover, placing his hand on Jack's chest, thereby stopping his entry into their home.  With as much patience and diplomacy as he could muster, he continued, “Listen to me very carefully.  For *five* solid hours, I've endured this ... celebration of yours.”

Jack smiled and took a breath to begin his serenade again, until his soulmate stunned him by slapping his hand over his mouth.  His eyes widened in surprise.

“I don't think so.”  Daniel slowly shook his head in warning.  Using his other hand to hold Jack in place, he took a deep breath and decided to drop the patience and diplomacy, saying sternly, “Jack, after only an hour of this ... hi-ho'ing, Jacob wanted to shoot you with a zat, just once.  After another hour, Selmak threatened to shoot you, twice.  By three hours, Sam was starting to wonder if a MP-5 might be more effective.  Thirty minutes after arriving back at the SGC, General Hammond nearly asked one of the SFs to escort you to a holding cell for a night of solitary confinement.  Janet already has a *very* large needle with your name on it, and the only reason Teal'c didn't follow through with his offer to knock you out and put us all out of our misery, is because I talked him out of it.  I'm starting to think I shouldn't have.”

“Daniel,” Jack mumbled through Daniel's hand, though the word was barely distinguishable.

Daniel was on a roll and continued, “Lou threatened to forcibly take you in, and pay for, a full body wax, and I mean *full*, Jack; Siler nearly succeeded in handcuffing you to a briefing room chair with Teal'c offering to swallow the key; and Sergeant Davis said he'd risk a court-martial and activate the Gate, so we could shove you into the 'wave'.  Once it was clear that you were signing out and leaving them blissfully free of your 'singing', they *all* offered me their sincerest sympathies that I had to share a ride home with you.”

“But ...” Jack mumbled, frowning when his soulmate's hand applied more pressure to his mouth, and Daniel shook his head again.  Still, he was smirking, pleased with his songful humor.  ~Hi-ho, hi-ho, Seth had to go ...~

Daniel was breathing hard as he paused for a brief moment before continuing, “I've had enough!  After the last forty minutes of torture during the ride home, I could quite happily do any number of those things to you.  Stop right now, or I'm leaving.  You'll be sleeping by yourself, making you ... cold, bored, alone, and *very* celibate.”

The archaeologist cautiously removed his hand to see what the verdict was.  There was silence, blissful, wonderful silence.

~Wow!  It ... it worked,~ Daniel thought to himself.

“You drive a hard bargain, Daniel,” Jack replied, prying Daniel's hand from his chest.

Feeling somewhat victorious, Daniel patted his Love's cheek and stated, “Just remember, Babe, if you don't get off this soprano kick of yours, nothing's going to be *hard* in this house for a very long time.”

It was just after three in the morning, and SG-1 had just been released from the SGC an hour ago after spending a very long and full day in Washington State.  Now, Daniel just wanted to fall asleep on his Jack pillow.  The lovers made their way through the front door and climbed the stairs.

The weary archaeologist thought back over what they'd been through over the last two days and what had triggered Jack's jovial mental state, as well as the current threats of bodily harm from his friends and co-workers.

Jacob Carter, Sam's father, who was, as he kept reminding the Tau'ri, one of the 'oldest and wisest' among the Tok'ra, had arrived the day before the trip with the unwelcome news that they suspected there was a Goa'uld on Earth.  Tok'ra records on a System Lord named Setesh ended when the Stargate had been buried in Ancient Egypt.  Hoping to get a lead on this missing Goa'uld, otherwise known as Seth, as well as many other names, Jacob had come to seek the assistance of SG-1.

With Daniel's extensive knowledge, he had informed the group that Seth was described as the “Ancient Egyptian god of chaos, embodiment of hostility and … outright evil.”

As to the reason why Seth could still have been on Earth without having tried to enslave the planet's population, Jacob had explained, “Seth had a hefty price on his head ... he tried to overthrow Ra.  Now, the System Lords wanted him dead, as did the Tok'ra.  We believe if he's still here, it's because he's using Earth as a place to hide out.  He wishes to remain hidden among you.”

Using what he knew of the nature of the Goa'uld, Daniel had done some research and managed to track Seth down as being the leader of a small cult, located just north of Seattle.  The cult had been under investigation by the ATF “because they've become so heavily armed and fortified,” the archaeologist reported.

//Flashback//
“Seth,” Jack said mockingly after everyone had left Daniel's office except himself. “That doesn't sound so menacing.”

“It's just a name, Jack,” Daniel replied as he made some notes about the information he'd found on the cult leader.

“Yeah, well, it doesn't leave me quaking in my boots,” Jack said as he leaned forward, hunched over his lover's worktable.

“Wouldn't want you quaking in your boots, Jack,” Daniel spoke.  **In bed, maybe, but not in your boots.**

**Daniel Jackson!** Jack laughed mentally, looking over at his Love with eyes that were sparkling in amusement.  As Daniel continued to make his notes, the colonel intoned, “I don't get it, Danny.”

“Don't get what?” the younger man asked, not looking up as he focused on his writing tablet.

“The guard's nose drips.  I don't get it,” Jack stated, referring back to their meeting and the Jaffa joke that Teal'c had told.  He grabbed a pen and a piece of paper and began to doodle a dripping nose.  “I just don't get it,” he repeated.

“Well, uh, it appears Jaffa jokes aren't all that funny,” Daniel opined, glancing over at Jack's drawing.  ~Ewww.~

“Teal'c thought it was pretty hilarious,” Jack countered as he flicked the pen in his hand.  “I've never heard him laugh like that before.  Have you?”

“No, but he is a Jaffa, and then there's ...”

When Daniel trailed off, lost in his written comments, the older man interrupted, “Daniel!”

“What?”

“Then there's what?” Jack prompted, wanting to know what his lover was going to say.

“What?”

Jack growled, “You were talking about Teal'c and ...”

“Oh, yeah.  Jack, Teal'c thinks Siler is funny,” Daniel noted.

“He is,” Jack agreed dryly, earning him a strange look from the younger man.

“Jack, don't you have something to do?” Daniel questioned.

“Ah, let me think.  No!” the colonel replied brightly.

“Well, I do, so ...”

Daniel stopped talking, waving Jack away with his left hand that was motioning towards the open door.

“I get no respect,” Jack said, straightening and putting the pen down.

“Go!” Daniel ordered.

“No respect at all,” Jack claimed as he slowly headed for the door.

“Goodbye, Jack.”

“Goodbye, Daniel,” Jack grumbled as he entered the corridor.  **I still don't get it.**

**Go to Chulak, and I'm sure you can find some Jaffa willing to explain it to you, Babe.**

**Ha, ha, ha!**

Daniel reached across the table, taking hold of Jack's drawing.  Shaking his head, he crumbled it up and threw it away.
//End of Flashback//

That had been a crazy conversation.  At this point, Daniel wasn't sure what was worse -- enduring Jack's soprano singing, having been one of Seth's cronies, or the mere memory of Teal'c's Jaffa joke.  He sighed, continuing to recall the events that had transpired in Washington.  SG-1 and Jacob had arrived in the state early the next morning, on a rainy and overcast day.

//Flashback//
“It's August.  Where's the sun?” Jack asked, as he walked down the steps of the aircraft, bending his head all the way back to look up at the dark clouds that were overhead.

“We're in Washington, Sir,” Sam answered.  “It rains a lot here, about a hundred-fifty-five days a year.”

“Weather one of your hobbies, Carter?” Jack quizzed.

“I read a lot, Sir,” Sam answered dryly.

Jack turned around, having no comment, and asked, “Where's our driver?”

“I believe that to be him, O'Neill,” Teal'c responded, seeing the airman walking purposefully across the tarmac.

“Jack, it might be best if we drive ourselves,” Daniel pointed out.

“Yeah, I'll take care of it,” Jack agreed.

====

“O'Neill.  We are being surveilled,” Teal'c offered, having spent the last several minutes taking in their surroundings after they had arrived at the compound housing Seth and his followers.

“Yeah, I saw 'em.  Probably FBI, maybe ATF,” Jack answered covertly.  As he began to walk away, he grinned and said, “I bet you twenty bucks it's FBI.”

“No, my bet's on ATF,” Daniel countered.  Seeing his lover's incredulous expression, he smiled and added, “Sorry, Jack.”

“Yep, ATF,” Sam agreed.

“ATF,” Jacob offered.  “And Selmak agrees.”

“Indeed,” Teal'c concurred.

“Well, you'll all be singing a different tune when I'm proved right,” Jack expressed confidently as he walked away.

====

Not long thereafter, the team made contact with the lead investigator from the Bureau of Alcohol, Tobacco, and Firearms, better known as the ATF.  Having lost his bet, a dejected Jack had enjoyed 'pulling rank' on the unsuspecting agent, flashing his 'the President loves me' wild card.

While waiting for word from the President, Jacob told them that, in all likelihood, Seth was brainwashing his followers by using a substance known as Nish'ta, which was a more potent form of the drug Hathor had used to get control of her male followers.

“It's a biological compound that, once inhaled, infects all tissue in your body, including your brain.  It tends to make your mind extremely pliable,” Jacob told them.

The effect of the compound could be eradicated by an electrical charge, such as that from a zat gun.

With SG-1 having been put in charge of the operation by higher-ups, much to the ATF's leader's dismay, the team turned their attention to infiltrating Seth's well-guarded compound.  Daniel pointed out that it was likely Seth had tunnels leading into the compound, something Teal'c confirmed when he added that Apophis had escape tunnels built into all of his facilities.

After having found one of the tunnels, Sam came up with an idea to make sure the team didn't end up being unwilling followers of the System Lord.  To help protect them, Jack, Daniel, and Sam wore special earpieces that would give the trio a jolt of electricity, if needed, at the appropriate time, essentially shocking the team out of the effects of the Nish'ta.

With the rigged earpieces firmly in place, the three teammates began to make their way through the tunnel.
//End of Flashback//

As the lovers reached the top of the stairs in their country style home, Daniel just shook his head.  He stopped for a moment, staring at the older man.

“What?”

“Silence is golden,” Daniel replied, still pleased with his ability to silence his warbling lover.  As he headed for their bedroom, he continued to replay the events of the last few days.  ~Jaffa jokes would be better than this torture.~

It had been during their time in the tunnels that Jack had embarked on his new hobby of soprano singing.

//Flashback//
“So, Daniel,” Sam began.  “You feel pretty certain that if we get caught, he'll turn us into one of those zombies, rather than kill us?”

“Well, we're more valuable to him that way,” the archaeologist answered.

“Why?” Sam questioned.  “How do you think he'll use us?”

Daniel responded, “Well, historically, he used women as a harem.  They catered to his every whim and as a result they were well cared for.”

“Super,” Sam expressed wryly, not eager to experience that first hand.

“And the men outside the main court were used mostly as warriors and guards, protecting his compound, pretty much doing his bidding,” Daniel added.

As they reached a secure door, Jack questioned, “Dare I ask about the men inside the compound?”

“They were turned into eunuchs,” the younger man answered succinctly.

Jack stared at his lover in disbelief and said, “Eunuchs as in snippity-do-da?  Sweet.”  **Thanks for the image, Daniel.**

**You asked,** Daniel replied.

Having opened the door, the three went inside to a small chamber, where they were then transported by rings to a room higher up.  They were immediately surrounded by armed cult members, disarmed, and lined up on their knees in front of Seth.  Jack was on the left, Sam in the middle, with Daniel on the right.  Forced to the floor on their knees, they were questioned by Seth.

From his throne-like seat, the outcast System Lord spoke, “Welcome.  Who are you?”

Snarkily, Jack answered, “Well, I'm Larry, this is Mo, and of course, everyone's favorite, Curly.”

**Curly?** Daniel questioned.

**You'd rather be Mo?** Jack asked.

The silent banter ended when Seth showed off his glowing Goa'uld eyes and said, “Say goodbye to your impure military past.  We're always happy to welcome new disciples to the bliss that only Seth can bestow.”

Holding up the ribbon device, Seth released the Nish'ta, a green vaporish substance, which quickly enveloped SG-1.

Knowing what was happening, Jack quipped, “So help me, if I wake up and I'm singing soprano ...”
//End of Flashback//

Daniel sighed as he came out of his recollections of the events.  Fortunately, the earpieces had worked, freeing them from Seth's control.  At that point, SG-1 had been able to rescue the brainwashed-cult followers, thanks to a few well-aimed zat discharges.

As the cured cult members had tried to flee, Seth had tried to hide among them, but had been killed by Sam, who had finally been able to get the ribbon device to work for her.

As soon as SG-1 was topside, safe and sound, Daniel's musical torture had begun. A light drizzle had been falling down from the dark skies.

//Flashback//
Jack was in a happy mood.  They'd killed another bad guy, retrieved a mountain of weapons to add to their collection, rescued some pretty unfortunate teenagers, and, best of all, he hadn't been snipped.

“Hey, T,” Jack called out.  “The guards -- their noses didn't drip!”

Teal'c raised an eyebrow, loomed threateningly for a few seconds, then turned his back to Jack and pointedly walked away.

“Hey, what's that supposed to mean?” Jack shouted, trailing after his large friend.

Daniel shook his head as he kept his walking pace behind the others.  He looked over at Sam, feeling a bit concerned.  Her father was with her, though, his arm around her shoulders.  That caused the archaeologist to smile.  He knew the father and daughter had traveled a difficult road over the years, but the Stargate had unexpectedly brought them together again.  He caught a glimpse of a smile from the blonde, and that, too, made him feel better.

“Daniel, you comin?” Jack called out, having tired of trying to goad Teal'c.

“I thought you were trying to get Teal'c to strangle you?” Daniel chuckled as he caught up with the older man.

“He has no sense of humor, unless it's a Jaffa joke,” Jack responded.  Walking toward the vehicle that would take them to the airport and ultimately back to Colorado Springs, he quipped, “We're walking in the rain, just walking in the rain.”

**Stop it, Jack.  It's raining, okay.  You don't need to sing about it,** Daniel complained.

**Okay, I won't sing about the rain.**  Opening the door and getting inside the vehicle, the colonel waited until his team was settled in, seatbelts on.  He started the car and began the drive to the airport.  Then he smiled, whistled two notes, and sang, “Hi-ho, hi-ho, to the SGC we go ...”

Daniel hung his head low, Sam buried her head in her father's shoulders, and Teal'c placed himself in a light state of kelno'reem.  Unfortunately, the Jaffa was the only one able to successfully drown out the singing soprano.
//End of Flashback//

After having endured hour after hour of Jack's mock-soprano musings, the archaeologist had been about ready to commit murder.  They had returned to the Mountain, gone through a musical debriefing, and tended to various other obligations.  Regretfully, Jack had seemed to be everywhere, and where Jack had been, his musical musings had been as well.  Thus, Daniel was in a long line behind the rest of SG-1, Jacob, General Hammond, and many other co-workers at the SGC, all of whom had begun their plots of homicide, or, at the very least, revenge.  Even Daniel's attempt to get Jack admitted to the infirmary for the night had backfired.

//Flashback//
“Janet, it's an alien substance.  Don't you think you should study it?” Daniel asked.

The physician looked down at the chart she was writing on and thought her friend might have a point.

“Well, it is possible that ...”  The redhead's words were cut off by a singing Jack -- loud, still off key, and waving his arms all around dramatically.  Janet cleared her throat, finished her notation on the chart, and stated, “He's perfectly normal, Daniel.”

“He is?” the archaeologist asked in surprise.

“Well, normal for him,” Janet smirked.

“But ...”

“Daniel, Nish'ta is not causing the colonel's behavior,” Janet assured.

“But, Janet, don't you think ...”

“Nice try, Daniel, but no way.  *I* have the nightshift,” the doctor stated, her eyes widening briefly.

“Oh,” Daniel expressed, having resigned himself to endure Jack's irritating new habit all alone.
//End of Flashback//

At last, as the couple changed for bed, Jack, thankfully, stopped singing.  They were tired after their long day, and both still had to report in to work at 10 a.m., so they decided to take their showers in the morning.

Just before sliding into bed, Daniel reiterated, “Remember, Jack.  One note and I'll make you an eunuch myself.”

“Okay, okay, not a sound, I swear,” Jack replied, grinning.

The twosome settled into bed, Daniel's head resting atop Jack's chest, as was their custom.

Suddenly, Jack's grin widened, and, going an octave higher than is natural, he sang, “I have to quip that Seth's a drip, we had a tip and got a grip, but best of all, I'll let it slip that we got out without the snip!”

Daniel lifted is head and warned, “You are on the thinnest ice, Babe.  One more sound, and I'm gone.  I mean it.”
 
Jack made the motion of zipping his mouth closed and then moved his hand to rest on Daniel's back.

Less than a minute later, Daniel's ears were assaulted with, “Danny is here, I love him near; he has beautiful pecs, and I'd *really* love to have se...”

Before his lover could finish the word, Daniel bolted from his lover's embrace and began to dress.

“Danny!” Jack  said, laughing, sitting up on the bed.  “I was joking, Angel.  Come here.”

“Goodnight, Jack,” Daniel said, having basically just put on his pants, shoes, sans the socks, and then grabbed his coat.  “See you in the morning.”

Jack laughed, certain his lover would turn around, but Daniel walked out of the bedroom and down the stairs.

“Daniel, for crying out loud!  Can't you take a joke?” Jack shouted.  Quickly, he got out of bed and hurried down the stairs, his bare feet touching the living room carpet just as his lover closed the front door.  He slid along the entranceway, almost banging into the door.  He opened it and started to call out, until he saw Daniel driving away.  ~I sure hope that old thing doesn't break down again.~

Grumbling, Jack locked the door and went back to his lonely bedroom, where he flopped dejectedly across the bed.

“Stubborn geek,” the colonel groused as he pulled the covers over his head.

====

Bright and early that morning, Jack went by Starbuck's, getting Daniel's favorite coffee, and then to Krispy Kreme, picking up hot glazed donuts, along with some other favorites.  He hadn't slept much the night before because he was worried about Daniel.  Though his attempt at humor via his singing had been the catalyst for the younger man's departure, Jack realized something deeper was bothering his lover.  He also knew it was his job to fix it.

The colonel arrived at his soulmate's apartment at eight, being as quiet as he could be upon entering.  He figured Daniel would be sound asleep, so he was surprised when, after putting down the coffee and donuts, he spied his Love, fully dressed and standing at the railing of his balcony, looking over the city.

“Hey,” Jack greeted, stepping out onto the balcony.  As Daniel turned to look at him, Jack pointed back towards the kitchen, saying, “I brought a peace offering.”

“Waffles and chocolate?” the younger man asked, his face lighting up at the thought.

Jack responded, “Ah, Arabian Mocha and KK's.”

“That'll work,” Daniel said, smiling.

Jack approached his life partner, and the two kissed tenderly.

“So, not mad?”

Daniel chuckled, “No, Jack, I'm not mad, *as* ... long as you're not going to start singing again.”

“It's lost its appeal,” Jack replied, leaning in for another kiss.  After obliging, Daniel turned back to stare out at his view of the Springs.  As he did so, Jack put his arms around him from behind, smiling when Daniel's hands took his and caressed them.  “Danny, you're up early.”

“It's nothing.”

“Is it?”

“Jack, I'm fine,” Daniel spoke.

“Fine?”

“Perfectly fine,” the younger man insisted.  “I just woke up and decided to stay up.”

“Love, me thinks thou doth protest too much,” Jack quipped, then asked more seriously, “What's going on?”

Daniel turned around and faced his lover, a solemn expression on his face as he answered, “Didn't you notice?”

Jack shook his head, shrugging as he responded, “Apparently not.  What was I suppose to notice?”

“Seth,” Daniel said.

“Dead false god,” Jack said smugly.  “What about him?”

Daniel sighed, moving away from Jack and going back inside.  He stopped by the piano where a small four-by-six photograph sat.  It was a photo of an eight-year-old Daniel with his parents that had been taken in New York the week before they had died.  He picked up the photo, turning it around so that Jack could see it.

“You and your fol...ks,” Jack stated, suddenly realizing what had shaken his lover. He cocked his head, acknowledging, “There's a slight resemblance.”

“I know it's just coincidence,” Daniel sighed.  “But it was eerie, Jack.  For a split second, I thought it was him, with ... longer hair.”  He looked down at his feet, adding, “And ... for a crazy moment, I ... wanted it ... to be him.  Gawd, that's sick,” he said, turning around and putting the photo down.  He gripped the edge of the piano, shaking his head.  “Why would I wish something so horrible?” he asked, his voice cracking.

Jack walked to his lover and put his arms around his waist.  He kissed Daniel's nape, then buried his nose against his shoulder for a second.  He could feel his lover's combination of despair and sadness.

“A year after Billy died, I saw this kid at the record store.  He looked so much like him,” Jack spoke, recalling an experience he'd had after his older brother, Billy, had been reported missing in action and presumed dead during the Vietnam War.  “I followed him around all day.  I knew it wasn't Billy, but it made me feel closer to him for a few hours.  It was crazy; it didn't make sense.”

“Did he know you were following him?”

“Yeah,” Jack answered.  “He finally cornered me right before dinnertime; told me to stay out of his face.”

“Oh.”

“That snapped the illusion, but I still didn't head for home until he had disappeared from my sight.  It was odd,” Jack recalled.  “Danny, when Sam zapped Seth ...”

“For a moment, I couldn't breathe, Jack.  He was lying there, and all I could see was my father, crushed to death.  Then I heard you crack that 'hail, Dorothy' line, and it snapped me out of it.  I knew the man lying there wasn't my father, but, still, for that split second ...”  Daniel paused, taking a calming breath.  “Jack, I think we should pressure them to find out who he really was.”

“A Goa'uld can stay in a host for several hundred years, even without a sarcophagus,” Jack reminded.  “We'll probably never know who the host was.”

“But we can try,” Daniel said, turning his head to the side to glance at his lover.  “Can't we?”

“Okay, we'll try, but please don't be disappointed if we find nothing.  The odds aren't on our side.”

“I know,” the archaeologist acknowledged.

“You know what's really odd,” the older man stated.

“What?”

“Some System Lord he was.  Danny, all these years on Earth, and we knew nothing about him and his little cult,” Jack mused, shaking his head.  “If Jacob hadn't turned up when he did, and if the ATF had moved in, it would have been pretty hard for the Air Force to cover that up, not to mention all the lives that would have been lost,” he said more soberly.

Daniel turned around, still in Jack's arms and placing his own hands around his lover's waist, and replied, “It was pretty pitiful.  I mean, he had the Nish'ta and the weaponry.  What was the point of attracting attention with the extra arms if he didn't want to rule Earth?  It was ... odd.”

“If it were just some idiot from some no-nothing town trying to make a name for himself, I'd understand, but a Goa'uld?  That's a bad showing,” Jack opined.

“Yeah, it is.  From what we found out, he'd kill some for ... I don't know, for the pleasure of it; recruit a few more, and ... do it again.  He wasn't gaining anything,” Daniel remarked.  “It was just a sick game to him.”

“He definitely would've been in the headlines if the ATF had moved in,” Jack replied.

Daniel chuckled lightly, bowing his head.

“What?” the colonel asked, wondering what on earth he'd said that was funny.

“Jack, you had a field day with that ATF guy,” Daniel pointed out.

Jack grinned, admitting, “He was so easy, Danny.  He just hated not knowing what was going on.”

“It was all ... classified,” Daniel laughed.

After the lovers shared a small laugh over the comment, Jack frowned and asked, “Danny, when you left last night ...?”

Daniel sighed, “I was just so tired of your warbling, Babe.  Gawd,” he leaned his head back and rolled his eyes, “from the moment I told you about the eunuchs ...”

“Snippity do da, snippity ay, my oh my, what a wonderful day ...” Jack began, singing in a high-pitched, humorous voice.

“Jack, I warned you.  I'll be calling in all those favors everyone offered me yesterday, and, unless you want Janet to, uh, slip with a scalpel next time she's down there ...”  Daniel threatened, intentionally pausing, his eyes boring into his lover's.

“It's all 'circumcisable' evidence, Danny,” Jack chuckled, while Daniel groaned.  “There were ten sad eunuchs sitting on a wall ...” he began, singing in an upbeat manner.

“Jack, the Mountain is twenty minutes away.  You have a choice to make,” Daniel began.  “You can keep singing ...”

“Sing!” Jack began in an upbeat manner.  “Sing an eunuch.  Sing out loud.  Sing out strong since that's all you can do to ...”

“Jack!” Daniel interrupted sternly, knowing what would silence his wayward lover.  With one hand covering Jack's mouth and the other stroking over his crotch, he wiggled his eyebrows and said, “It's either singing about eunuchs, or ...”

“I'll take the 'or',” Jack stated quickly with hopeful eyes. “There's always an 'or'.”

“I want you, Jack,” Daniel said seductively.

“I love you, Danny, love you so friggin' much,” Jack stated emotionally before kissing him.  “Danny, did everyone really threaten all that stuff at the SGC?”

“Let's just say, I can be pretty persuasive, and you're exceedingly lucky I'm in love with you and do not want you damaged in any way,” the younger man chuckled.

The lovers kissed and moved quickly to merge their bodies into one.  They had an hour to enjoy their desires, shower, and dress again.  Heating the coffee and taking the donuts with them, the couple decided to drive Jack's truck to the Mountain.

As Jack pulled out onto the street, he began to sing, “One bad eunuch spoils the whole bunch, boy!”

Daniel rolled his eyes and banged his head against the headrest as he prayed, “Give me strength.”

~~Finis - Finished - Done - The End - But is it ever Really?~~
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